Every once in a while, Domer MQ expects me to earn my lucrative paychecks and actually write something. So, when he asked me to do a season recap, naturally, I said, "What season?" "Notre Dame," he replied patiently. "What year?" I asked. "2009 should do it," he said, through gritted teeth. "Sport?" "Football." "Why are you swinging your fists like that?" So, here I am, bruised, bloodied, and forced to relive a season which most of you have already forgotten, or that you ...
BREAKING: Biscuit Okay, Not Thrilled with Weis’ Return
LOS ANGELES- Her Loyal Sons investigative reporters have recently learned that HLS correspondent "Biscuit" is "pretty much resigned, and sort of okay with" Notre Dame head football coach Charlie Weis returning to coach the team in 2009. The first indication that Biscuit would eventually support the decision of Notre Dame athletic director Jack Swarbrick to retain Weis was on December 1, 2008, when an irate Biscuit, fed up with rumors swirling about Weis' possible dismissal, wrote, "If your ...
Dillon Panthers Coverage: Episode 2 “Bad Ideas”
The episode starts with a bang, as baby Grace Taylor is crying in Dillon, and Coach Taylor isn't liking his new job, his uncomfortable hotel room, and not falling asleep on his wife Connie Britton's chest every night. Tyra is awoken late at night by a call from Landry. Landry lost his watch on the guy he murdered and dumped in the river in Episode 1. Isn't that exactly what happened in I Know What You Did Last Summer? What ever happened to Jennifer Love Hewitt? And Sarah Michelle Gellar, ...
The HLS Totally Non-Homer Top 25 – Week 7: Mob rule.
Well, it's official. The polls are completely meaningless now. I can tell, because domer.mq has given me the power to do the Top 25 for this week. I don't believe in curses and hyperbole, but the #1 slot clearly has been CURSED WITH A CURSE MORE HORRIBLE THAN ANY CURSE WHICH HAS EVER BEEN CAST UPON ANY CURSED THING EVER. With that in mind, here is your Top 25: 1. Boston College. Have fun losing to Virginia Tech on the 25th, Massholes. 2. The instant replay rule. 3. This guy. 4. ...
Dillon Panthers Coverage: Episode 1 “Last Days of Summer”
Are you looking for a "backup team" to root for now that college football season is, for all intents and purposes, over? Well, I hope you're turning your televisions on Friday nights to the best show that no one is watching, Friday Night Lights. If you're not watching, never fear. I'm here to provide you with belated recaps of the comings and goings of the defending Texas state high school champions, the Dillon Panthers. The first episode, "Last Days of Summer," aired October 5. Here is ...
Friday Roundup: The “Tailgating Season Starts Tomorrow” Edition
Well, DomerMQ is on vacation AGAIN, so I guess the Friday Roundup falls on me, which is slightly better than having Coach Weis' D.U.F.F. here fall on me. The Roundup: The gentlemen at BGS break down tomorrow's Irish-Yellow Jacket matchup, complete with starting QB theme songs, invented words like "Wheelerific" and "cheapshottery," a partially mummified Jerry Jones, and the delightful Elizabeth Banks. They also talk about football. Demetrius Jones' high school coach, Lexie Spurlock, ...
Quinn Reminds Browns Fans Why They Deserve to Be Browns Fans
After lackluster performances by both Charlie Frye and Derek Anderson, Browns fans were treated to an inspired fourth-quarter performance by rookie quarterback Brady Quinn. Quinn threw for 155 yards and 2 touchdowns with no interceptions in just over nine minutes in the Cleveland Browns' Saturday night matchup against the Detroit Lions. Quinn went 13-20 in putting the other two starters' numbers to shame. Browns fans, tired of booing Quinn for his justifiable holdout from training camp, ...
Happy Birthday to the Founder of the Feast!
Today is DomerMQ's birthday. If you know him and see him, punch him. If not, feel free to wish him well in the comments. Happy birthday, you ornery old curmudgeon. Yes, that is a real cake. ...
In Last Appearance of Spring Training, Samardzija Surrenders Hit to Cyborg with Sotos Syndrome
As expected, Cubs pitcher and former Notre Dame wide receiver Jeff Samardzija, pictured here after Cubs manager Lou Piniella forced him to get his hair cut, will not be heading north with the team when they break camp at the end of this month. Samardzija was one of 14 players cut from the big club on Monday as the Cubs optioned him to the single-A Daytona Cubs. Before Samardzija was cut, however, he had a chance to face San Francisco Giants slugger Barry Bonds. Bonds was allowed to wear his ...
Quinn “Heavily into Goldeneye” on N64
Former Irish quarterback Brady Quinn published the first of his blog entries on his road to dominating the NFL. Quinn mentions that he used to play a lot of Tecmo Bowl, and that he was "heavily into Goldeneye" on his N64. So, ladies. The next time you say I have nothing in common with Brady Quinn, keep in mind that I, too, was heavily into Goldeneye, and I probably could kick Quinn's ass at it, even if he got to play as Oddjob. Where you at, Golden Boy? ...