This week, the Michigan State football chaplain got himself in a bit of trouble for making a public boast about the Spartan basketball team, that was of questionable taste (to say the least). I know this is as much of a shock to you as it is to me – not that a priest has a filthy mouth, but that Michigan State athletes would welcome a man of God without trying to boil and eat him. I’m sure you also had the same initial suspicion that I had: a priest with low manners joining freely with our enemies must be a Jesuit. But keep in mind that Jesuits are characterized by dangerous intelligence. Michigan State players are not.
Much of my confusion was cleared up when I was informed that said chaplain is a graduate of the University of Michigan. What does one expect from a Wolverine but an angry snarl…and a grunt? At the very least, we must applaud the missionary zeal that has led him from Ann Arbor even deeper in partibus infidelium to East Lansing. This whole episode has given me cause to think generally about the ministry of the team chaplain, and to consider specifically issues of proper, upstanding conduct on the part of these ministers of Holy Church. We have so many of these Grace-Coaches here at Notre Dame, that our congregational post-nominals might as well be written CSChaplain.
Since St. Sebastian first took his turn as goalie for the Roman archery team, we have celebrated the Athleta Christi Nobilis, the Noble Champion of Christ. In these enlightened times, we no longer smite or slay; we limit our exertions to defeating in sportsmanlike fashion our opponents – who nonetheless remain enemies of our souls, bent on our utter destruction. It is for the coach to be like the military commander in this athletic combat. It is for the chaplain to be like the spiritual Department of Defense Inspector General, preaching, correcting, rebuking, and encouraging in season and out of season. Both coach and chaplain should manifest a love of the athlete as well as a love of the game. But while the coach can get away gutter-mouth exhortations peppered with barnyard language, locker room imagery, and hyperbolic threats of grievous bodily harm (all bellowed at ear-splitting full volume with eyes bulging and veins popping), the chaplain must set his mind on things that are above. Here are a few guidelines for appropriate sports chaplain conduct.
Fight the GOOD Fight. By all means cheer, jump up and down, and shake your fist at the opposing team. But leave the violent challenges out. With a very few exceptions, a chaplain would be returned to the dust from which he came if he ever tried to take on a strapping college athlete of any sort. Your Heavenly Dad might be able to beat up his dad, but after a real fight, priest, you’d be collecting your teeth with broken hands. And don’t be crude. Insult all you want – I’m French, my people created the art of insult. But draw some lines that exclude bodily functions and obscenities. Remember: that the end of your days, you may have to kiss your Blessed Virgin Mother with that mouth.
God made you to LAUGH. Like Abraham’s wife Sarah. But like Sarah, make sure that everyone’s laughing with you. We’re talking about sports and it’s good to be passionate about your school and your team. Skewer, lambaste, satirize, and lampoon the other school and the other team. You can even go after a couple of the opponent’s star athletes for shoddy performance or public foibles. But don’t get too personal. Even though it’s hard to believe at times (especially in the case of Michigan), the people on the other side of the field, or court, or stands are just that…real human people. They are all children of God (though at USC they are very naughty, dirty children). And be prepared to take all the abuse that will, rightly, be shoveled your way. Even Michigan State fans are capable of wit, albeit ham-fisted and ungrammatical. But don’t respond to vulgar baiting, don’t join with an opponent who is steeped in filth. Tangle with an Alabama fan once, and no matter how much ritual washing you perform, the stench will linger upon you for months.
Be prepared for the rain to come, the stream to rise, the wind to blow, and your house to fall down. Because it will. You can’t win ‘em all. The chaplain’s most important work comes right after the defeat. Comfort the afflicted, instill hope, and never, ever, give up on your athletes, your team, or your school. It’s not just football chaplains who have to be prepared to take hits. There’s always a lot of talk about team spirit. Well, if a chaplain isn’t keeping up his team’s spirits all the time, but especially in the darkest moments, he’s about as useful as a diploma from an SEC school. Sports are metaphors for combat; so never forget the example of a true combat chaplain, Father Aquinas T. Colgan, who always told his troops staggering back from battle, that as long as you’re alive, “Every night’s a New Year’s Eve; every day’s a payday!” He was a good Irishman, Fr. Colgan…but alas, he was a Carmelite.
Above all, no matter what the sport, no matter whether the team wins championships or is the doormat of the league, the chaplain must always give his athletes all his heart, all his soul, and all his strength. Brothers, take the tennis chaplain as your model – for, of us all, only the tennis chaplain truly serves.
EFS CSC
P.S. If there is any chaplain out there who has mastered all of these virtues, please tell this occasionally crass, usually barbed, sportsfan-sinner how to do so.
- Good Fridays w/Padre: WORTHY! - November 30, 2018
- Good Fridays w/Padre: The Horror - October 26, 2018
- Good Fridays w/Padre: BALLS! - September 7, 2018
Mike Skurka'81
Fr. Sorin,
Thank you for including a smiling picture of Fr. Jim Riehle. As a former resident of Pangborn Hall and a former ND hockey team student manager, I have many fond memories of Fr. Riehle as our cigar smoking rector and athletic teams head chaplain. As you know, he used to be a pretty good hockey player, too, and was nicknamed “Cheapshot” by some opponents. He provided a lot counseling in those days, words of Holy wisdom seasoned with a little common sense and competitive drive.
Keep up the postings.
Mike
Father Sorin
James was one of the finest. He served his term as Dean of Students during one of the worst of the worst times to be in that position, and he did it nobly. Every student learned – few were punished. He was what is great about Holy Cross and Notre Dame…in my model, of course.
GOOGLE
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