If you sat through the interminable Fox pregame show before the B1G championship, you were subjected to a host’s visible revulsion to your undefeated Fighting Irish being somehow in the mix for a CFP spot.  His ire arose from the fact that Notre Dame was not playing in a conference championship.  Cheeseburger Saturday.

“Why,” goes my paraphrase of his passion, “should Notre Dame get a look at a playoff spot when they’re not on the field playing against Pitt or Northwestern?”  If you sat on public transportation or took your place in the corporate hive on Monday, no doubt you were subjected to something similar from some co-worker from a two-loss school.  Years ago, the “problem” was that Notre Dame had descended into irrelevance.  Today, it’s that the ascent came without a thirteenth game.

Or that Florida State and Stanford and Virginia Tech were actually really awful when we played them but not when the season started — except for Michigan, who were actually awful when we played them, but that was okay for them because they’re Michigan men and they got a lot better until they played Ohio State but that’s okay too because Ohio State is a playoff-caliber team except for that game against Purdue.  See, if you apply college football “logic” to your Notre Dame experience, everything begins to make sense.

Let’s take a look at a team like, well, like Clemson.  Very talented team, they’re in the South, they’re coached by a guy named “Dabo,” and they’re in a conference.  That ticks all the boxes for the college football gods.  Clemson played and defeated eight conference opponents (Georgia Tech, Syracuse, Wake Forest, NC State, Louisville, Boston College, duke) from the ACC.  Clemson played and defeated South Carolina, an out-of-conference foe that finished 7-5, and Texas A&M, an out-of-conference foe that finished 8-4.  Clemson played and defeated Pitt, an in-conference foe that finished 7-5 in the regular season.  Clemson also played Furman and Georgia Southern.  Two teams — Boston College and North Carolina State — were ranked — 17 and 16, respectively.

Notre Dame’s 12-0 record is far better than Clemson’s 13-0.  Here’s why:  Notre Dame played and beat four ranked opponents — Michigan (#14), Stanford (#7), Virginia Tech (#24), Syracuse (#12).  Notre Dame played and defeated five ACC teams, two PAC-12 teams, two B1G teams, one MAC team, one AAC team, and one SEC team.

The difference, thus, between Clemson and Notre Dame is that Notre Dame is in the North, is coached by a guy named “Brian,” and is independent.  That’s the only thing that makes sense. I mean, those are the only differences.

But they’re not.  They only meaningful difference is Clemson’s thirteenth game, against Furman.  Furman is a college, true, but it’s an FCS-school, which is meaningful in that IT’S NOT A DIVISION ONE SCHOOL GET OFF MY LAWN.  Playing Furman is the equivalent of playing Furman.  In any sport.  I’d love to think that the tens of you reading this post will somehow result in it’s becoming bulletin board material for the Notre Dame v Furman national championship in 75 years, but that’s not likely because there won’t be tackle football in 75 years and Furman won’t be competing for the national championship in 75 years.  No one will.  The post-apocalyptic, nuclear winter will have taken care of that.

The reality is that Notre Dame does and always should play a schedule that gets it in the playoffs.  Or the round of sixteen.  Or whatever the future holds.  An undefeated Notre Dame team should be a lock on a playoff berth.  A one-loss Notre Dame could be, depending on what else is going on around them.  But until no one else is playing FCS-free schedules, Notre Dame’s schedule should not be the problem.

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Surely Notre Dame is worthy of entry into the College Football Playoffs.

Yet, facing the results of last night’s games, what more can the Irish do to prove their worthiness?

Trial by Fire

A 50-gallon drum of burning refuse and offal is placed before Brian Kelly. He reaches in and pulls out the remnants of Michigan’s Revenge Tour. If Kelly is uninjured, then he is worthy to lead his team into the playoffs. If he also pulls any remnant of Michigan’s pride, he’s a miracle-worker.

Trial by Combat

One player from Notre Dame and one player from another team, selected at random, are closed in a 9’ by 12’ room and given two beds, two chairs, two desks, and two wardrobes. They may attack each other with any of these implements. If the Irish player walks out of the room under his own power, carrying either the sink or the radiator he has wrenched out of the wall, both he and Notre Dame are deemed worthy to enter the playoffs. Notre Dame players will have an advantage in this contest, because it’s also called “Freshman year in Dillon, Alumni, and Zahm.”

Witch Dunking

The Leprechaun is hurled into St. Mary’s Lake. If he sinks, he was good and the Irish are worthy of a playoff spot. If he floats, he is evil and Notre Dame’s season is over. Sorry to cheer against you little fella, but here’s hoping your green tuxedo and genie shoes are lined with lead. And don’t worry – we’ve got plenty more short, feisty, hirsute men on campus.

Duel

Clark Lea and Dave Clawson (Wake Forest’s head coach who scored the most points on the Irish this season with 27) are each given a rapier, and then clash until one is touched…or stabbed a little bit…three times. However, while the blade of Clawson’s sword is 26.01 inches long, Lea’s blade is 33.59 inches long, reflecting the difference in time of possession. In the alternative, each man is given a blowgun and, standing 10 yards apart, they use the strength of their lungs to shoot darts at each other. Clawson has only 398 darts, but Lea gets 566 darts, commensurate with total yards in the game. Either way, when Clark Lea wins, Notre Dame is acknowledged as being a worthy playoff team, and Dave Clawson has the distinction of being the only man left bleeding in the wake of the Irish twice in one season.

Tial by Poison

Brian Kelly has to watch the entire compilation of ESPN’s coverage of Notre Dame from the entire season, without a single break. If he doesn’t soil himself or go insane with rage, the Irish go to the playoffs.

The Bridge Troll

In order to prove that Notre Dame is worthy of competing in the playoffs, two Irish captains must answer three complex and tricky questions. Drue Tranquill (majored in mechanical engineering) and Sam Mustipher (majored in computer science) are presented with the three queries. Since actual hunched green dwarves who live under bridges are in short supply, the questions will be written by a substitute troll – Desmond Howard (majored in…communications).

EFS CSC

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Interestingly enough, “Rudy” had its world premier in South Bend exactly 25 years ago this month. That season, the Fighting Irish went into the last game of the year, at home, undefeated and #1, only to be beaten by a substantially lower-ranked opponent. Let this be a dire and horrifying warning!

For October is the month of horror, ending as it does with Halloween, the night when ghosts and demons cavort openly among the living. American film-goers love to be horrified, because they know that what they are watching is not real. Irish football fans hate to be horrified, because what they see before them is oh-so very real.

Thus, let us bring together movies, the Fighting Irish, and the Naval Academy Midshipmen (who can be all too horrifying) and re-imagine some horror films with better endings:

“The Poseidon Adventure”

In theaters: A rogue wave capsizes a cruise ship, killing all but our heroes, led by a Minister.

In San Diego: A wave of Irish offense swamps the Middies, led by our hero, a Book.

“The Last Voyage”

In theaters: A heroic father leads his wife and daughter to safety after a boiler explosion sends a cruise ship to the bottom.

In San Diego: A heroic Kelly leads his Irish and their fans to victory after an explosive Notre Dame sends Navy to defeat.

“The Perfect Storm”

In theaters: Three deadly weather systems converge on a fishing boat which is engulfed by the sea.

In San Diego: Eleven deadly defensemen converge on the hapless Middies who are engulfed in loss – unfortunately for Navy, it will be Tranquill weather.

“Below”

In theaters: Terrible things happen on a Navy submarine.

In San Diego: Terrible things happen to Navy next to their submarines.

“Jaws”

In theaters: A great white shark eats people.

In San Diego: A great Irish defense eats Middies.

“The Abyss”

In theaters: Divers encounter underwater aliens.

In San Diego: What the Middies will be staring into.

“Dead Calm”

In theaters: A murderer pirates a sailboat.

In San Diego: The Navy cheering section.

“Deep Rising”

In San Diego: Irish Rising

“Moby Dick”

In San Diego: A cut-blocker

“All Is Lost”

In San Diego: The Story of the Navy Midshipmen

“A Night to Remember”

In San Diego: The Story of the Fighting Irish

EFS CSC

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In their biggest game since the last one, the Fighting Irish pummeled the then twenty-fourth-ranked Virginia Tech Hokies, 45-23.  The match had been pitched as a test of Brian Kelly’s boys’ ability to win an important game away from the friendly confines between the mums.  If crushing a twenty-fourth-ranked team before sixty-seven thousand somewhere in the rural South can exorcise the demons of last season’s self-immolation on South Beach, then Dexter Williams is Father Karras.  ABC’s Kirk Herbstreit said the Notre Dame back ran with “desperation,” to exorcise the demons that kept him from the field for the season’s first four games.  Whatever the motivation, he punished the Hokie D to the tune of 178 yards and 3 touchdowns, one of which was a 97-yard dash and the longest score in their stadium’s history.

There were minutes in the second quarter, long minutes in which the Irish defense was unable to stop the Hokie’s offense between the thirties, and a palpable sense of dread rose across Notre Dame nation.  With the Irish leading on the strength of a solid opening drive for a touchdown and then a field goal from Justin Yoon, now the highest scorer in Irish history, the Hokies started picking away with field goals of their own.  Ian Book stumbled.  An all-too-familiar story was unfolding.

But then Julian Love scored on a scoop and score off a Ryan Willis fumble on a Khalid Kareem sack.  Put aside the Hokie touchdown that followed to end the half.  Notre Dame took a 17-16 lead into the locker room.  That locker room may as well have been a forge, for the players who came out were steeled.  The Hokies were not ready.

After a Tech punt that pinned Notre Dame deep, Dexter Williams went the length of the field in two carries, the first of which went for negative two yards.  On the next possession, Ian Book connected with Miles Boykin for a forty yard score.  Boykin was a favorite target who notched 117 yards and two touchdowns.  Virginia Tech would score in the third quarter.  In the second half, Notre Dame outscored their opponent 28-7.

By Sunday evening, Notre Dame was ranked fifth in the country, behind Alabama, Ohio State, Georgia, and Clemson.  By Sunday evening, Notre Dame was squarely in the mix for the playoffs, given the likelihood of running the table.  By Sunday evening, Sandman had come and gone.  His sand had nothing on Irish steel.

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Who put the Ball in Ball State? The very generous Ball brothers, who became very wealthy by building a better, smarter fruit jar. It’s not a sexy way to make money; but all things considered, glass pickling jars are a lot more popular today than what our first benefactor sold – fur.

Since we’re playing host to Ball State, I thought I’d be hospitable and put the Ball in football:

Have a Ball – What we did with Michigan last Saturday night. And I don’t mean only on the field. Our fans had a ball in the stands. FINALLY! The Stadium was…I’m struggling for a term…loud. Yes, it was loud. That’s probably as shocking to you as it is to me. And I don’t know if there is a single factor that made the difference – everyone in the same shirt color, a compelling video clip on the big screen, hatred. It could be any of those. But let’s make sure it wasn’t a one-time-thing. Let’s have a ball in the Stadium for the rest of the season, because it really helps the lads have a hell heck of a ballgame on the field.

Keep an Eye on the Ball – What we need to do tomorrow. Ball State was very good at football once. I don’t mean once as in ‘during a particular period of time’; I mean once as in only one season, ten years ago. But that’s absolutely no excuse to let our guard down tomorrow. Nothing could be more devastating than winning a big game and then losing to a small opponent. Trust me, I’ve seen it waaay toooo many times. Coaches, players, and fans need to keep their eye on the ball and secure a decisive victory.

Ball of Fire – Sure, our offense should play like one. But I’m not a big fan of fire. If you want to know why, look at the year over the middle windows on the fourth floor of the Main Building, and then look up the founding year of the University. Tell me what happened between the two dates.

Too Many Balls in the Air – I have no problem with this, as long as they’re caught. If not then Take the Ball and Run.

Behind the Eight Ball – Where we’d like to see Ball State. Heck, let them score eight points to avoid the shame of a shutout. Such things are reserved for old friends, and we’re meeting these folks for the first time.

Drop the Ball – Not gonna do it.

That’s the Way the Ball Bounces – Fine, as long as it’s into our hands.

Get the Ball Rolling – Tailgating.

Ball of Wax – Grotto.

Ball and Chain – NCAA.

Bawl – What Michigan did last week.

Baal – An ancient demon worshiped by Philistines; a Jesuit.

Ball Don’t Lie – No idea…something to do with Karma. Like calling an opponent chicken and then losing to them.

Ball Out – To do something successfully and with great ease. Notre Dame DEF Ball State

Crystal Ball – Don’t have one, But 42-7 is a safe bet.EFS CSC

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I had a whole series of suggestions for appropriate (and more realistic) welcoming signs. But, as usual, my wisdom was neither sought nor appreciated by the current administration. When they retire you, they take away your keys and your clout. So I thought I’d share my preferred welcome signs with all of you here.

Imagine these written in blue script on a gold signboard. In fact, imagine these written in that awful, awful wedding-invitation-script that they’re using on the Shamrock Series uniforms:

The Struggle May Not Be Real,

But Parietals Are.

Your Mother Can’t Stay With You,

But OUR MOTHER Will Never Leave You.

The Notre Dame Trail Ends Here.

The Notre Dame Trial Begins Here.

This May Be Your First Year,

But You’ll Always Be Freshmen

To Me.

We Don’t Control The Weather,

But We Do Control

EVERYTHING ELSE.

Welcome, Probationary Alumni!

Now Leaving South Bend, Indiana,

And Entering Notre Dame, Indiana.

Do Not Make That Mistake Again.

Stay Off The Grass,

Don’t Feed The Leprechaun,

Fear The Squirrels.

Dorms On The Edge Of Campus

Have Amenities.

Dorms Closer To The Main Building

Have “Character.”

Welcome To MY World.

EFS CSC

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As the first Sunday of Lent recedes in our spiritual rearview mirror, I cannot help but think that this week figures somehow too in the liturgical year of Irish sport. The women’s basketball team are champions of the ACC, for the fourth time, while the men are a three-seed in the conference tournament, set to start, for them, on Thursday. And the football team is ready to launch itself, now, for real, into another season. Yes, this week, whenever it started, is big for old Notre Dame.

I’ve decided to take a new approach to football this season. Whereas in the past I was consumed with “10 things to watch” and “8 players who need to step up,” the college football equivalent of a Cosmo cover, I am now going to trust in the process and digest what I can from the coverage. I am not going to tip my hand or hat as to what I think is critical. I have learned that I don’t know nearly enough to do so and that at the end of the season, The Irish will be where they were meant to be, by preparation, execution,
and chance.

The player I most want to see succeed this year is Jerry Tillery. I think he has earned the sobriquet of “erstwhile” or “perplexing” or “disappointing” after his seasons under the Golden Dome. Yet, there is something about him, a certain je ne sais quoi, that makes me want him to be great this year. We all saw it in the Showtime series A Season With. There is something good inside him, something good outside of the gridiron, that needs to live this season.

I am going to trust in the coaching staff. None of us have any clue about running an elite college defense or offense. We pretend that we do, to greater, or lesser, degrees of success. We don’t know what is going on inside the locker room or the scrimmage huddle, such that all we can do is guess about what is going to be best for the team. I am going to trust that in Coaches Elko and Long, Coach Kelly has selected men who will get the most out of their systems.

Ash Wednesday’s Gospel reading cautioned us to do our good works in private or in silence, lest we fall prey to the temptation of doing them for the sake of recognition. Maybe that approach will serve me better.  There will always be statistics to analyze and personalities to cover, schemes to dissect. I’m just going to try and leave out the grand prognostications. I’m not good at them anyway.

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The Fighting Irish 4-8: We began the 2016 season ranked tenth and widely expected to vie for a place in the Freemason’s playoff scheme. And then we lost…to nearly everybody including the Navy (again). How terribly unexpected! We can beat Duke in their beloved Cameron Multipurpose Indoor Room, but we can’t defend Notre Dame Stadium from a team with a .490 all-time record. We cast our Dutch scapegoat into the desert, but we were not ritually purified. Our conference officials didn’t help matters, though their literacy classes in the offseason might enable them to read the rule book next year, with special concentration in the sections on “The Varieties of Pass Interference,” and “Targeting: That Elusive Pixie.”

When one gazes upon the Campus CrossToBear Crossroads construction reaching its climatic conclusion, and then considers the shambolic collapse of the football team, one can only be put in the mind of the Tower of Babel. And, oh, did the Alumni babble about this season, this coach, this athletic director. Yet, nothing says ‘reasoned dialogue’ like an angry letter to the newspaper. And nothing says ‘unhinged screed’ like having to pay to get your letter printed. Note to disgruntled Alumni: If you have a serious concern you would like to bring to the attention of Father President and the men behind the Board of Trustees curtain, take a sheet of bond paper (preferable watermarked) and, using a fountain pen, in your best calligraphy, list everything you appreciate about your Alma Mater, followed by a very brief description of what currently burns your ass frustrates you, and enclose a big fat check. Better still, make the check really, really big, and take your place behind the curtain. But full-page ads designed with all the flair of a fifth-grade science fair poster only make you look petty and small-minded; in short, you look like Michigan fans.

First Championship in 108 Years: No, it hasn’t been that long for the Fighting Irish (though it might feel that way); but it was that long for a hapless baseball team from Chicago. How chronologically unexpected! It’s always nice to see a perennial loser finally grab the brass ring. I just wish we weren’t edging dangerously close to becoming that perennial loser. Perhaps we can take a page from the Cubs’ playbook. They believed in their old, and storied team no matter how bleak recent seasons had been (check); They sank lots of money into stadium enhancements (check); they devoted even more money and effort into getting the best leadership and coaching talent available (how ‘bout them Cubs!). Yes, in the Cubs I believe we can see that there is always hope for the future, no matter how interminably long that hope as to wait. We may not know the day nor the hour when victory will strike…but there are a few constructive things we can do to hasten its arrival. Above all, the Fighting Irish do share one critical characteristic with the Chicago Cubs: Both teams are owned by Catholic families.

NCAA Sanctions: You have to love a supervising authority that rewards honesty with harsher penalties than obfuscation, deception, and lies. Yet, we must ask what our administration thought would happen when they “self-reported” a purely internal and substantially inconsequential matter. This was not unexpected. And now our administration is behaving like the zookeeper who lives with lions and, despite dealing with their claws and feces for years, is still bitterly disappointed when one bites him in the neck. In the new year, we need to recall that the NCAA was created by colleges and universities to assist them, not to rule them; and in assessing punishments for bad behavior, proportionality, justice, and equality must be the guiding principles. Well, if any collegiate administration does that, it will be truly unexpected. For my part, I am going on a New Year’s diet – I’m not swallowing any more of the garbage the NCAA is shoveling.

New President: Right on schedule there was a presidential election. Nothing unusual here. But a very loud man won that election in a manner that was quite unexpected to many. I myself am rather a-political; but watching the debates between the two candidates, I couldn’t help yelling, “We want Barabbas!” Whether he was our choice or not, we should wish the new President well. To do otherwise is no better than hoping the captain of your ocean liner finds the nearest iceberg because he didn’t invite you to sit at his table. Our own Father President will have to decide if he should invite the new President of the United States to deliver the Commencement Address in the coming year. Whether he does or he doesn’t, Father President can expect several more angry letters in the newspapers and full page ads. If you are thinking of preparing either of these, see my advice above. And stop making fun of the new President’s hair; I enjoy my untamed locks that reach past my shoulders and are mirrored by my waist-length beard. Believe me – nothing is so presidential as a sick flow.

Basketball School: This may be the most unexpected aspect of the fading year – we’re pretty damn darn good at basketball. Amidst the ashes of the football conflagration, let us hold onto the warm bricks of hope that constitute another successful basketball season. Maybe bricks aren’t the best metaphors when talking about basketball, but you get my point…or my three-pointer. In any event, no matter what infelicities 2016 brought, we must all have hope for 2017. And remember, 1879 was a pretty unexpected year for all of us at Notre Dame – but what we rebuilt that very year still proudly stands today.

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Reverse the third and fourth letters, and this football season could aptly be dubbed “The Notre Dame Trial.” Let’s compare and contrast, shall we:

11 days, 270 miles: The weather was so bad we only made five miles the first day. The team only won a single game in the first four outings. Don’t tell me a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step – it takes a whole hel heck of a lot more than that: preparation, planning, conviction, desire, zeal. We’ve had some of those to varying degrees; but now with a second victory under our cumulative belts, we need to have all of them, all at once, for every game from here on out.

Cold, Wind, Snow, and Ice: And tomorrow at noon, a hurricane. The elements were hard during the journey; the extremities and the skin suffered – and I didn’t have any of those fruity creams that people use to “moisturize” these days. Every game will bring its own unique hardships. But if we are to make it through this Notre Dame Trial, every hardship must be met with courage and overcome with tenacity. If you’re going to the game tomorrow, wrap yourself in a garbage bag and wear hip-waders.

Beat-Up Old Equipment: We have to recover from injuries faster and we have to stay healthy. If we’re going to make it, physical damage must be avoided at all costs, and all non-life-threatening injuries must be remedied as quickly as possible. Any off the field injuries will be treated as treason.

$310.00: Not a princely sum, but in 1842, nothing to sneeze at. Still, the money had to be used wisely. We have plenty of talent on the team; the issue is using that talent effectively. At certain points in recent games I have looked at our bursars (read: coaches) and realized that if they were managing my $310, we would have been stuck in a frozen swamp in the middle of Indiana, with mule that could perform magic tricks and opossum jerky. You have seven more games – coach to win, not to dazzle.

Rivers and Streams: May not seem like a big deal to most, but none of us could swim. I’ll just make a broad reference to the defense and leave it at that. Watching three Frenchmen and four Paddy Irishmen freak out while wading through rushing, 34-degree, waist-deep water is somewhat similar to watching our defense sometimes. But we made it, and so can they.

I don’t know who is planning to walk the Notre Dame Trail. My advice is, “Don’t do it.” I do know the team that is now going through the Notre Dame Trial. Believe me, “You can do it.”

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Padre’s book, Father Sorin Says: The Founder Comments on Today’s Notre Dame, is available from the Hammes Notre Dame Bookstore or Amazon. But you don’t have to walk several hundred miles to got it.

The post Good Fridays w/Padre: On Trial appeared first on Her Loyal Sons.

But, true to form, Spartans wasn’t their first name. As an agricultural college, they first competed as the Aggies. This was changed to the erudite and witty “Michigan Staters,” begging the question “What does a Stater do” – state the matter clearly, or change states of matter? The problem was solved after another week-long symposium of the greatest minds in applied science, who lighted upon “The Michigan State Sport Ons.” Aside from ending a team name in a preposition, this causes one to ask “Is there a sport-off;” either way, Sport Ons or Sport Offs just sound dirty. The solution was presented by local restaurateurs who hailed from Sparta in Greece. Thus were born the Michigan State Caterers – soon changed again to the Michigan State Spartans.

Ever since then, the Spartans have reveled in their tenuous Greek heritage. Recently, they have included a phrase on their uniforms and helmets: μολὼν λαβέ. This is where it gets complicated. The words are obviously ancient Greek, although the Michigan State players usually think it’s some kind of factory printing error. Pronounced like “molṑn labé” (causing Michigan State players to think they have an unsightly mole somewhere on their bodies) the phrase translates literally to “having arrived, take.” Legendarily, it was addressed by Leonidas, king of the Spartans, to Xerxes, Shahanshah of Persia. Xerxes had arrived in Greece for a little pillage and rapine. The Spartans stood in his way. Thus, “Molon Labe” is the ancient equivalent of “Come and Get It!”

And, oh my, the Persians did. Long story short: The Athenians defeated the Persians at Marathon (you’ve heard of that); the Persians went home, vowed revenge, and came back; the Spartans met them in September of 480bc at Thermopylae, a narrow pass in the mountains; Leonidas said “come and get it,” and over the course of three days, the Persians slaughtered the Spartans to a man.

Don’t put that phrase on my uniform! Sure, even though it was a strategic defeat, it was inspirational. But there are no parallels to the Michigan State Spartans – at least none that they should celebrate. First, they are invading Notre Dame, Indiana, not defending East Lansing, Michigan (because, really, who would want to). They are the aggressors; the inspirational advantage is with the Irish. Second, the Persian forces numbered some 100,000, while there were only 300 Spartans in the battle…along with 400 Thebans and 700 Thespians, who never get any credit except for dazzling stage performances. Either way, the Spartans were greatly outnumbered, just like the Irish, of whom there are 12,000; opposing are the forces of Michigan State, a top ten university – by size – with 50,000. Third, you can’t win for losing in football. Nor will it be inspirational for their fans if Michigan State holds the Irish scoreless for three quarters, while also scoring nothing, and then lets Notre Dame win 56-0 in the fourth (however, I do invite them to employ this very strategy). Finally, in ancient Greece everyone hated the Spartans. They enslaved local non-Spartans, and they fought destructive wars with Athens, Corinth, Argos, and Thebes, that ultimately resulted in their own decline. Wait…this sounds just like the Big 10; and come to think of it, you know you’re universally loathed when even the University of Michigan hates you. So maybe there is at least one parallel.

I understand what the Michigan State Spartans are going for with Molon Labe – Come and Get It. It’s similar to General Anthony McAuliffe in command of the American 101^st Airborne Division in the Second World War. As the Germans surrounded him during the Battle of the Bulge, the enemy commander offered McAuliffe the opportunity to surrender or be annihilated along with all of his troops. McAuliffe’s response read: “To the German Commander. NUTS! The American Commander.” That’s the kind of laconic bravery that is remembered through the ages. But it also helps that, unlike the Spartans, the Americans won.

And Anthony Clement McAuliffe was Irish Catholic.

So if Michigan State wants to say “μολὼν λαβέ,” I say “NUTS!” With a 48-28-1 record in our favor, if the Spartans think they’re going to beat the Irish, then they really are nuts. And later this season, when we include a phrase on our uniforms and helmets, it won’t be the last words of a defeated king; it will be the words that have inspired, and will continue to inspire for generations, in war and in peace: God, Country, Notre Dame.

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Padre’s book Father Sorin Says: The Founder Comments on Today’s Notre Dame is available on campus at the Hammes Notre Dame Bookstore, and from the ancient Greek warrior-ladies at Amazon. It’s a must-read for every Fighting Irish fan; and it’s a try-to-read for Michigan State fans.

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