It’s good to have football season back, is it not? And by “football season” I mean “arguing over #HLSrecap standings”.

Here are your @andrewwinn stats for this week’s #HLSrecap  — 129 tweets from 86 contributors.

As you know, each week we present the following highly-coveted (and yet totally arbitrary) accolades:

• Brick Helmet Stickers
• #HLSrecap Top 25
• #HLSrecap MVP

Here now is our Athletic Director, @FakeSwarbrick, who, after awarding helmet stickers, is off to hide BBQ chicken legs along the far sideline to distract the visiting coaching staff on Saturday.

Brick Helmet Stickers

My fellow Irish fans, our long national nightmare is over. Notre Dame football is back! I hear we had a game on Saturday against some school called “Rice.” Apparently we played four quarters with a full roster and, I’m told, came away with a victory. But according to my timeline there was more interest in a player than in the game. You guys all had one massive collective boner for young Mr. Everett Golson. Friends, I too shared in that boner.

And like the #NDtwitterati on my timeline, Golson showed no signs of rust after so long a break. It was tough sorting through my timeline to pick this season’s inaugural Helmet Sticker recipients, especially when the game was in hand early and we all sort of petered off.

Before I hand out the stickers, let’s recap what this is all about. Unlike other paths to Twitter immortality, the idea behind the Brick Helmet Stickers is to recognize an entire body of work throughout a game. It’s one thing to come up with a single zinger but it’s quite another to put together four solid quarters (and maybe OT) of joy, angst, paranoia, rage, suicidal ideations – or in the case of Notre Dame fans, all of the above.

Although it’s entirely arbitrary, let me tell you how I do this. Unlike @IrishElvis and #HLSrecap, where I assume he stars tweets as he goes along, I watch everyone. Once I see someone is having a good game (or a good meltdown, depending on the circumstances) I write their name down and then review ALL of their tweets later.

Nearly everyone I follow on Twitter is a good follow, but I’m looking for more than commentary on the game. “Another damn third and long!!!” is not going to cut it. The people who receive stickers are FUNNY. And CLEVER. And INFORMED. And making GREAT COMMENTS on the game and on other tweeters. They get my attention because they are tweeting things other people are not.

With that said, no surprises here in the first week. These guys worked hard in the off-season, lived in the weight room, and came ready to play.

• @SupermanTDJesus – a consistent performer from last year who tweets HARD until the final whistle.
• @Subway_Sprout – this guy started to really develop last season and came out like gangbusters during Rice. Clever, fast, funny….he is committed to his Twitter game.
• @HLS_NDtex – yeah, I know. He’s part of the HLS staff and I don’t care. He’s hard core funny. Bonus — follow him on Sundays during a Dallas Cowboys meltdown. Totally worth it.
• @OptimisticDomer – I think he is my spirit animal. FOLLOW!

And because she guilted me into it and because she deserves it, an Honorable Mention goes out to @CNHarder. Christianne tweets for Notre Dame during the game so we miss her sass. Also, she is getting this shout out in lieu of a raise. Again. She’s a great tweeter but a crappy negotiator.

#HLSrecap MVP

Now, onto the quantitative measures. This is just as it sounds — each week, whoever has the most number of tweets that make the final cut will be awarded the #HLSrecap MVP Award and the recipient of a jug and a couple drinking glasses from Indiana Whiskey.

Your co-MVP winners for the Rice game: @andrewwinn and @IrishMoonJ with 5 tweets.

There was a tie atop the rankings, so I had to distribute a single T.R.O.L.L. point to gain some clarity. I considered @IrishMoonJ for his brilliant tweets, but then quickly realized that a) awarding him Indiana Whiskey might kill the poor fellow, and b) @andrewwinn has been faithfully employed in the service of #HLSrecap with nary a cent of compensation. So raise your glass and join me in awarding a single solitary T.R.O.L.L. Point to @andrewwinn, and the #wHLSkey that accompanies his MVP status.

#HLSrecap Top 25

As a reminder, @andrewwinn awards one point for each tweet that makes it in; 1/2 point if someone else retweets/quotes/modifies your tweet and it’s included. The Twitter Ranking Of Leprechaun Legion (T.R.O.L.L.) Scale is awarded arbitrarily.

We went ahead and tightened things up this year, so dominant #HLSrecap performances are a bit harder to achieve. So for week 1, the Top 25 is more of a Top 10 with ties everywhere — and the vast majority of folks in the Top 25 are newcomers to the elite rankings. Welcome, newcomers! Don’t let the success go to your head; we need your best work again this Saturday night.

For those of you who were not included this week: you’re not far off the pace.

2014 Week 1 Rankings

Rank	Name	Tweet Data	T.R.O.L.L. Data	Overall	Final 2013 Rank
1	andrewwinn	5	1	6	7
2	IrishMoonJ	5	—	5	16
3	SupermanTDJesus	4.5	—	4.5	2
4	HLS_NDTex	3.5	—	3.5	1
5	OptimisticDomer	3	—	3	3
5	pburnsOFD	3	—	3	UR
5	taddmike	3	—	3	UR
5	WatchND	3	—	3	UR
9	1stDownMoses	2	—	2	UR
9	aheadofme	2	—	2	UR
9	arschroeder	2	—	2	UR
9	Austin4ND	2	—	2	UR
9	Candice4ND	2	—	2	24
9	D_Farmer	2	—	2	UR
9	Dixie_Domer	2	—	2	6
9	FakeSwarbrick	2	—	2	9
9	IntheBleachers	2	—	2	UR
9	IrishElvis	2	—	2	UR
9	IrishTightness	2	—	2	UR
9	JohnGcomedy	2	—	2	UR
9	kmac12380	2	—	2	UR
9	LetsGoRVin	2	—	2	UR
9	LluckoftheIrish	2	—	2	17
9	PaulRRigney	2	—	2	UR
9	PDXIrish	2	—	2	4
9	rakesofmallow	2	—	2	UR
9	Subway_Sprout	2	—	2	UR
9	TheIrishWon	2	—	2	UR
9	TheMattyPenny	2	—	2	UR
9	TheSubwayDomer	2	—	2	10

Others receiving votes: Everyone else…except those who were omitted altogether — looking at you, @pootnd, @oaknd1, @mrmayhem75, and @jvs3.

Click here for the Complete Game-by-Game #HLSrecap Recap Appendix.