So it has come down to this. Sixty-four tweets, innumerable shenanigans, and we’re left with four brave souls (I don’t think we have any gingers left in this competition, do we?).

Because voting on The Internet is serious business, I wanted to give you some more background on each of your finalists. You’ll find their answers to my hard-hitting questions below.

Anatomy of Your 2014 #HLSrecapMadness Finalists

Jumbotronless Region Champion: @SteveinIowa1

Hometown: Like John Cougar I was born in a small town. ‘Cept Iowa not Indiana
Current City: An even smaller Iowa town than the one I was born in.
Preferred Smartphone/Twitter application: Twitter for Android
Started tweeting: First Tweet tells me Dec. 1, 2011
Estimated words-per-minute: 5
Average tweets/day: 4.91

Grass Field Region Champion: @rakesofmallow

Hometown: Pittsburgh, PA
Current City: New York, NY
Preferred Smartphone/Twitter application: I used to use TweetDeck until Twitter ruined it. I haven’t found one I love since so I use the Twitter app. I realize this is a poor way to get vengeance.
Started tweeting: Fall 2010?
Estimated words-per-minute: Oh, I haven’t checked in a while but I was pretty good at the programs in elementary school. Fast enough on a keyboard, okay on smartphones.
Average tweets/day: Offseason, 5ish. Season: A dozen or more. Too many.

#NDFBisdeterminedtokillme Region Champion: @IrishMoonJ

Hometown: {left blank}
Current City: I-75 near W. Paces Ferry. Still haven’t made it home from the ice storm.
Preferred Smartphone/Twitter application: Siri
Started tweeting: I started with post-its that I’d just slap on people’s phones and computers. Then went “green” with paperless “wit” and discovered there was an entire group of degenerates who shared common snark interests: drinking, team self-loathing, and Lane Kiffin.
Estimated words-per-minute: How much whiskey have I consumed? It goes up…(also: see above)
Average tweets/day: Normally: 10-15; Field Turf Rumors: 10,000

Leather Helmets Region Champion: @ramzy

Hometown: Columbus, OH
Current City: Somerville, NJ
Preferred Smartphone/Twitter application: Twitter
Started tweeting: June 2009
Estimated words-per-minute: 80+ #B1Gspeed
Average tweets/day: You want me to calculate averages? [head explodes] #B1Gcollegedegree

At what point in the season did you write your tweet?

SteveinIowa1: That would be during the Purdue game, Elvis.
rakesofmallow: During the first half of the Purdue game. Things were not going well.
IrishMoonJ: Composed it after each and every pass TR threw in his career. Apparently hit “tweet” during the USC game.
ramzy: I had attended the Ohio State/San Diego State death match in Columbus and was several whiskeys into the Michigan-ND game at a campus bar. Somehow I distinctly remember this.

Where were you, and what were the circumstances/feelings surrounding your tweet?

SteveinIowa1: We were in the midst of a 4th Q comeback against Purdue. My daughter who loves ND football really didn’t understand how they were terrible all game long and then so dominant late in the game.
rakesofmallow: I was at the ND Club game watch in DC at The Exchange. It was not a great game watch, despite the quality company.
IrishMoonJ: Entrenched in a recurring nightmare. Circumstances: inebriated (probably). Feelings: I don’t feel, I’m dead inside.
ramzy: “Michigan is much more tackleable than this. WTF.”

What would this #HLSrecapMadness victory mean to you?

SteveinIowa1: Really it would be validation for all the mid-major Tweeters out there. We do quality work but don’t get recognized by the major polls. Ol’ Steve has never been a major player in Twittermania or #HLSrecap.
rakesofmallow: Just motivation to stay out there grinding, making terrible jokes.
IrishMoonJ: I assume it will be stripped and arbitrarily awarded to Tex, so……
ramzy: It would tell other 12-seeds that with copious amounts of whiskey and limp arm tackles, all things are possible.

Who helped you along the way to Twitter greatness?

SteveinIowa1: Definitely @theSubwayDomer. He cajoled me into starting an account and then had to harangue me into getting rid of the egg as my avatar.
rakesofmallow: I think @tricerapops is really the best. He has no shame in his terrible/awesome puns, and it’s inspiring.
IrishMoonJ: Everyone who I’ve unintentionally and intentionally stolen ideas from.
ramzy: I think I’m supposed to thank @TheTweetOfGod. [points to sky]

How does Twitter enhance your gameday experience (or does it)?

SteveinIowa1: Twitter is like a drug. I have an addictive personality and I binge on Twitter a lot and then try to go off cold turkey. It always sucks me like it, just like NDFB which I’ve tried to swear off multiple times. Put them together and I need 8 Advil and 4 liters of water on Sunday mornings before church.
rakesofmallow: It’s especially helpful to confirm you are not alone in your insanity, jubilation, depression or combination of the the three.
IrishMoonJ: I see less of the game, which I suppose cuts both ways. The Lady hates me less because I just quietly scroll and smirk as opposed to destroying our dilapidated, second-hand furniture. Operative word: “less.”
ramzy: Gameday twitter reminds me I’m not alone, which is misleading because we’re all so, so alone. Gameday twitter is a hallucinogen.

Growing up, when did you first realize you wanted to be #HLSrecapMadness Champion?

SteveinIowa1: Do you remember blogs? Those things that people wrote posts with some thought in them that could run on for hundreds of words that were more or less coherent? Back in those old days I always thought this seemed like too much work. Why can’t we strip this down and remove all context. Then came Twitter and I wish I’d invented it. Do you know how many NDFB Tweets I have literally LOL’ed with no idea what it was about it just sounded clever and I presumed it was funny if I only understood the joke. To this day I have no idea who ND fister is or who ND fake fister is.
rakesofmallow: I think last year when my Will Smith tweet lost.
IrishMoonJ: {left blank}
ramzy: I attended the Pinstripe Bowl and as Notre Dame slowly and clumsily strangled Rutgers to death, it occurred to me I should get some kind of award for staying for four quarters. So, December.

Where do you find your inspiration?

SteveinIowa1: Do you have a Twitter Muse who provides you with inspiration for material (current/former player, opponent, etc)?
rakesofmallow: Everything Twitter-related I do comes from a hatred of Michigan and watching too much TV.
IrishMoonJ: @Dixie_Domer. He. Is. Legend. That TR can’t lose to urinating in a fireplace depresses me greatly.
ramzy: I do pretty much everything @ramzyn tells me.

Aside from the remaining finalists, who would you consider your Twitter nemesis?

SteveinIowa1: Have to go with @Irishfootball11. He does wrestling tweets like @HLS_NDTex which I can handle in moderation but when you throw the ALL CAPS on top it makes my eyes bleed. I get that it’s his brand. He’s like the Sam Kinison of NDFB tweeting.
rakesofmallow: Oh, I don’t think I really have one. I’ve never had to block anyone and just keep a quick trigger finger on the unfollow button when I get annoyed.
IrishMoonJ: Auto-correct. The most ruthlessly efficient destroyer of good tweets.
ramzy: It alternates daily between @katyperry and @justinbieber.

Where do you go from here? Will you turn professional?

SteveinIowa1: I plan on coming back for my fifth year.
rakesofmallow: Try to get back to the final four next year. ND tweeters are incredibly talented so it’s an honor to get to compete.
IrishMoonJ: This is where I insert my “taking my talents to ____________ ” reference, right?
ramzy: Amateurism forever. I do it for the love of procrastination.

Anything else?

SteveinIowa1: Just want to thank all the voters out there for believing in the adorableness of little kid tweets. The internet loves that. And kittens. Can’t forget kittens.

Cast Your Vote!

Polls for this round close at 5:00pm ET on Saturday, April 5.

Semifinal #1

#6 IrishMoonJ vs. #8 SteveinIowa1

"dear lord: find this pass safely to my receiver." – Tommy Rees on any pass ever.

— Moons (@GAMoons) October 20, 2013

My 8 year old girl just now: "Daddy, does Notre Dame wait until later to play their good players?"

— Steve in Iowa (@SteveinIowa1) September 15, 2013

[poll id=”156″]

Semifinal #2

#12 ramzy vs. #13 rakesofmallow

Notre Dame tackles like Patrick Swayze in Ghost. Or like Patrick Swayze now. Like both.

— Ramzy Nasrallah (@ramzy) September 8, 2013

"Brian, how is my defense looking?" "NOT GREAT, BOB."

— Chris W. (@rakesofmallow) September 15, 2013

[poll id=”157″]
Polls for this round close at 5:00pm ET on Saturday, April 5.

View Full Bracket