Everyone is out there talking about solutions for the Televen. They offer up adding ND (never gonna happen), Texas (never gonna happen), Syracuse (really?) and other programs from the Big East. Pros and cons are discussed. Cases made and rebutted. But they’re all short-sighted and small-minded. The solution for the Televen is staring them right in the face, and they’re just somehow missing it:
Drop Michigan (sucks) from the conference.
It’s the easiest, smartest, and cleanest solution. Think of all the benefits this has:
1) The Big Ten will ACTUALLY have 10 teams again. Hooray! No more stupid jokes about how you can’t count. This alone makes it worth dropping the Skunkbears.
2) The 10 team setup allows for two 5-team divisions yet maintains the ability for cross-division rivalries, and OOC games to continue. Big Ten East and West, yay! Yes, they’ll be small divisions. But they’ll suck 10,000% less without UM being in the mix, so they’ll be smaller but stronger overall
3) No more RichRod to deal with. This, in and of itself, is ginormous. How the decision wasn’t made a year ago is beyond me.
4) No more Brian Cook to deal with. The only thing better than no longer having to deal with RichRod.
5) MSU can start calling UM ‘little brother’ and such, because UM will be the ones kicked out of the party. HAHAHA! Poor Widdle Michigan, all alone out on the street corner. Have a safe walk home!!! HAHAHAHAH. Nerds.
6) One less team on the bottom half of the conference to drag you down. C’mon, do you really need a team that goes 3-9 and 5-7 representing your conference? That’s just embarrassing.
7) Financially, it makes a ton of sense. Think about it – all that cable money divided by 10 instead of 11! Even you can do that math, you Big Ten grads you!
8 ) They suck at basketball as well, so really, what’s the point?
9) Do you REALLY need multiple schools for a state whose biggest industries are dying? Besides MSU has the superior academics – they have a school of PACKAGING for Pete’s sake!
10) Domino’s Pizza is the worst ever. If Papa John had taken over, we might not feel this way. But Domino’s? Please.
Do the right thing Televen. Make it the Big 10 again. Kick the skunkbears to the curb. Because we all know they just plain old suck.