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Home > Notre Dame Football > Leprechauns 2016: The Main Event AKA Predictions for the Future of Things That Haven’t Happened Quite Yet

Leprechauns 2016: The Main Event AKA Predictions for the Future of Things That Haven’t Happened Quite Yet

August 17, 2016 by The Biscuit

So, we’re past the apps (we got apps!) (by apps I mean the preview which you should go read first) and into the full meal. Let’s cut the shit and get at it yeah? Here are my way too early, based on not all that much predictions. Which somehow end up BEING WILDLY ACCURATE SUCK IT VEGAS.

Time for these Leprechauns to………………………………………………..

Dance.

THE SCALE!

leprechaun6 This is just as likely to be wrong as it is to be right (aka the BadKermit Effect)

leprechaun6leprechaun6 I’ve got a good feeling, but am leaving myself some wiggle room

leprechaun6leprechaun6leprechaun6This is a lock, I am a genius, I cannot be wrong.

Here we go!

Texas

Texas wasn’t “Texas” last year. Still isn’t, but this is away, and they’re better than they were. And, frankly, we lost a ton. QB great, backfield great, OL decent but not better, WRs waaaaaay worse. TE the same but less depth. Kicking the same. D is likely about equal on the DL (maybe slightly lesser), LBs lesser, DBs should be better than they were but not gonna make up for the lesser crew up front. So yeah, that’s my deep analysis on the depth chart.

Back to Texas.

We’ll win. It’ll be tight through the half due to being Away, Sunday night, under the lights in TX. But we’ll pull away in the end of the 3rd, beginning of the 4th. THE SCORES WILL LIGHT, BIG AND BRIGHT, DEEP IN THE HEART OF TEXAS.

Frosh QB? General Rebuilding for the (kind)StrongMan?

ND wins 33 – 20

leprechaun6 leprechaun6 Two leps because Texas!

Nevada

Ouch, Nevada, ouch. We have this backfield and 6 of your starting front 7 have graduated? And you barely cracked .500 last year? And it’s at Notre Dame? Sorry Wolf Pack, you’re screwed.

ND Wins 40 – 14

leprechaun6 leprechaun6 leprechaun6 Three Leps. Sorry Wolf Pack.

Love your Mascot though.

Michigan State

Oh boy! Now we get into the meat. Sparty is back, and predicted to be pretty darn good. While ND is hovering in the 9-13ish range pre-season, Sparty is rocking their own Top 6-11ish ranking. Dantonio can coach everybody, in case you didn’t know.

Sparty is gonna bring what they bring: hard-nosed D, a good running game, a white dude that can somehow run against Notre Dame (only) and a running back that will drive us INSANE. I haven’t even looked at the depth chart and this is truth.

I don’t think we can pull this one out though. Too many key losses and Sparty is primed for a run. Blah. I hate predicting losses, but can’t find a way despite the home advantage.

ND loses 17-23

leprechaun6 One Dancing Freaking Leprechaun. Going to be a tight one, we could surprise and shock the Spartans. Here’s to hoping my genius is stupid on this day.

DUKE

Ah, back to the smart kids. Except, Duke has learned to play football? HUH? Another good coach-that kinda-sorta worked at ND for like 7 minutes-has done a good job with the Blue Devils. But shoot, it’s not enough guys. Why? Well, last year wasn’t great against a mediocre schedule and DEVILS ARE RED NOT BLUE SHIIIIIIIIIIT.

ND wins 36-13
leprechaun6leprechaun6leprechaun6 3 Leps dancin’ up in yo face.

Syracuse

ND wins 35-6. All TDs in this game for ND, all field goals for the Oranges.

leprechaun6leprechaun6leprechaun6 Three! That’s THREE Dancing Leprechauns AH AH AH.

NC State

Wait. 2 WOLF PACKS. Is this the Sequel? I gotta say, Bangkok wasn’t quite Vegas. Not sure how I feel about this.

Eh, you know what? I’m gonna call it – similar to Nevada, just less good.

ND wins 35-21.

leprechaun6leprechaun6

Stanford

OH YOU TREE, DAMN YOU!

I like that there’s another school that cares about academics. I like it.

I DESPISE that we let them creep into our zone. OUR ZONE. Of being legit in academics and actually good at football. We’ve been pretty even the last chunk of the series, and it’s been exciting and fun to watch and I respect them and all but DAMN YOU THAT WAS OUR BRAND POSITIONING YOU SHOULD GET YOUR OWN.

Okay, anyway, the game. It’s gonna be tough. It’s gonna be tight. It’s gonna come down to the final drive one way or the other, and you know it. It doesn’t matter about what we lost and what they lost. It doesn’t matter if it’s at night or during the day. It doesn’t matter if the The Shirt color changes every year or…WAIT YES IT DOES THAT’S THE WORST THING EVER SERIOUSLY.

Home field advantage matters though. A lot. In the last 5 meetings, the home team has won. THAT’S IT. THAT’S THE TICKET!

ND wins in the last minute, 31-30. Because LAST YEAR.

leprechaun6

Only 1 Lep because it’s gonna be a tough, tough game.

MIAMI-NAVY TOGETHER

First ever DUAL GAME SINGLE PREDICTION.

Gonna be tough. They’ll come out ready because they consider us a rival. We’ll be playing to a friendly crowd in this venue. They’ll come out trying to sink our battleship like a Hurricane but ND will be ready and will weather the storm well.

We’ll run, they’ll run. We’ll pass, they’ll pass a little.

We’ll win! ND wins both games, 24-20. (In reality, Miami should be much more of a test than Navy but that’s no fun so we’ll go with this)

leprechaun6 2 Leps because this is pretty silly. But watch, gonna nail it!

NAVY-MIAMI

See above, just holding the space so we have 12 games and I don’t get screwed up here.

leprechaun6

Army

TRAP GAME.

Why? Well, just because Army is like Navy’s little, less capable, and perennially beaten up by them brother. And since we just beat Navy (and Miami) 24-20, well, we’ll be taking it easy. This is that game I hate because we always play down in the first half. Down in terms of energy, and down to the opponent level.

But the second half we’ll figure it out, clean it up and make it happen.

ND wins 27-13 after a 13-13 half time score.

leprechaun6leprechaun6 2 Leps because if we don’t turn around that momentum it could really be Admiral Ackbar style here.

Virginia Tech

What’s VT like after Beamer Ball has ended? Not great. But getting things figure out.

So, clearly an ND win yeah?

Nope, ACTUAL TRAP GAME.

After figuring out Army post half time, ND feels like it’s survived the trap game. But, the trap was after the trap. SHIT TWO TRAPS.

Look, seasons are weird and I don’t see this team, with all that we’ve lost, going through this gauntlet with 1 loss. And since I’ll be there I sure as hell CANNOT pick USC to beat us at the Coliseum. So, VT in the upset. F.

ND loses 24-14.

leprechaun6 1 Lep because calling 2 traps in a row has never been done before in the history of the leprechauns dancing their amazing dance.

Southern California

How will ND react? After being shut out of the playoff through a bad loss? Will they fold? Will they toss in the towel against their cross-country rival in the California sun/lights? Will the Irish give it up and move along, and focus on the next season? Will the Irish…FOLD?!?!?!?!

HELLO NO.

The Irish will trounce USC on this beautiful fall day, as my pops and I watch in glory and Coors Light-created buzz.

ND wins! 17-14.

leprechaun6 1 Lep because it’s a long season, lots can happen, and USC is no longer completely incompetent (SIGH, those were fun days weren’t they?)

Summary

This is a weird year. I did less research yet I feel about the same about the predictions. VT is outta nowhere yeah, and I’m sure you’ll say ‘that’s stupid Biscuit’ and it may be. But I don’t think we’re a 1-loss team. Yet. Next year? Yep, we can be 1 or, gasp, NO losses.

This year I feel like we’ve lost so much in the front 7 and in the WR corps that it’ll be tough to get there. And overall depth isn’t great. Honestly, we could’ve been a contender again if we’d had less attrition to the NFL. Man, it could’ve been amazing. But, still a good year at 10-2, and a chance to redeem ourselves in a top tier bowl. Because I was at Ohio State in the AZ desert and that offing sucked.

10-2 ain’t bad, should be a fun season!

GO IRISH, CRUSH EVERYONE.

AND DANCE YOU LEPS YOU DANCE DANCE DANCE!

leprechaun6leprechaun6leprechaun6leprechaun6leprechaun6leprechaun6leprechaun6leprechaun6

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The Biscuit
Founder, Head of Ranting
Don't take me, yourself, or life so seriously. This is supposed to be fun.

Biscuit co-founded HerLoyalSons in partnership with his ND roommate (Dillon Hall baby!), MQ, in 2006 and has been ranting about ND Football and everything Notre Dame since. He strongly believes in the mission of ND and its football program. Biscuit expects logic and data in arguments and will absolutely crush you if you come to a debate missing one or the other. He despises everything Michigan, and his favorite pastime is mocking Purdue.
Latest posts by The Biscuit (see all)
  • (Re)Introducing: DANCING LEPRECHAUNS - August 29, 2019
  • Ticket Auction: ND vs USC - August 22, 2019
  • No Respect! - December 14, 2018

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Filed Under: Notre Dame Football

About The Biscuit

Founder, Head of Ranting
Don't take me, yourself, or life so seriously. This is supposed to be fun.

Biscuit co-founded HerLoyalSons in partnership with his ND roommate (Dillon Hall baby!), MQ, in 2006 and has been ranting about ND Football and everything Notre Dame since. He strongly believes in the mission of ND and its football program. Biscuit expects logic and data in arguments and will absolutely crush you if you come to a debate missing one or the other. He despises everything Michigan, and his favorite pastime is mocking Purdue.

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Comments

  1. Bayou Irish

    August 17, 2016 at 10:12 am

    One of my favorite times of year. Like the swallows returning to Capestrano, the dancing of the leprechauns means that things are happening. While I don’t disagree with anything you’re saying, 10-2 seems like a disappointment. Watch us go 8-4 just because I said that. But hear me out. We got sooo close last year with our backup. We have a ton of talent. Sure, the wides are inexperienced by their giants. Our secondary is very good. I don’t know. I think we’re the real deal. Not that 10-2 sucks. Not at all. But it strikes me as disappointing all the same.

  2. Jeff James

    August 17, 2016 at 9:10 pm

    Nice to see a Domer with a sense of humor (and perspective). Honestly, I’d prefer an 8-4 season with a Pinstripe win as opposed to 10-2 or 11-1 and get plowed under in yet another meaningful bowl game against the team that finished #5 in the CFP race…

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