This weekend concludes our 4th Michigan Sucks Week here at HLS. And we think it’s time to make some big changes. I don’t speak for everyone, but this will be my last Michigan Sucks Week. From now on, after this post, I’ll no longer dutifully add “sucks” to the end of any use of the term “Michigan” (sucks!).
Why? Because it just doesn’t quite seem to fit anymore. Oh, to be sure, it fits Michigan (sucks!). But it doesn’t fit me. Life brings changes pretty rapidly, and this season, this Michigan Sucks Week just didn’t have the same National-Holiday-like feel as previous Michigan Sucks Weeks.
I think the problem is that simply saying Michigan Sucks isn’t descriptive enough. Yes, Michigan Sucks, but why? Is it the absurdly low graduation rates of Michigan (sucks!) African American players? Yes. Partially. Is it the amazing gall of an entire school to consider itself a top-flight institution of higher learning when only about 68% of all undergrad students manage to earn a degree in 4 years*? Certainly, in part. Is it the fact that an abnormally large amount of Michigan (sucks!) paraphenalia is purchased at Sears? Of course, but each of those reasons is just a small bit of the gigantic puzzle of suckitude that Michigan (sucks!) has managed to assemble, and each reason deserves a moment in the spotlight. Let’s face it, life is short, and my time is probably better spent on more worthy endeavors.
The other issue I’m having with the entire gag is that I’m just not entertained by it anymore. There’s a lot of funny stuff out in this world of ours, and Michigan sucking isn’t even amusing today. It’s just kind of sad.
And so with that, let me just say, for one final time: Michigan Sucks!
The Roundup:
- It’s been a long time since he was at Florida, so we forget. Has Spurrier ever not had a QB controversy?
- We’re happy for the kid, but the entire reason he’s even being written about in this piece still makes us quesy.
- Oh, my nose!
- We hate Domino’s Pizza, but we love Kory Minor. Quite conflicted. (HT: NDN)
- HRB descends upon us to remind us that He’s not dead. He can’t be killed.
- Take this bit by the Quad on the challenges “premier public universities” face in maintaining highly competitive football programs with a grain of salt. It included Michigan under the “premier” umbrella.
- Maize N Brew, the one tolerable Michigan blog of which we’re aware (believe he had the good sense to marry a domer), looks back on ND/UM History.
- Got Hero? Eric Olsen does.
- Friday Roundup: That Was Fast Edition - December 14, 2018
- Ian Book Is Smokey and the Bandit - December 12, 2018
- Don’t Call It A Comeback - December 10, 2018
The Biscuit
Boo, partner, boo. I will never, ever stop. Never.
DagerOne
How ’bout following the lead of Eric and Sprout over at The Subway Alumni Show?
Go Irish, Fuck Michigan.
brendan
Now that you’ve said this something in the next few days will pop up that will be so irresistible that you’ll just HAVE to break it. And then we will welcome you back to the fold.
Michigan sucks.
Mark
Whoa, whoa, whoa. They don’t cop to Sears, that’s waaaaaaaaay to high class for the Wolverines.
http://walmartwolverines.com/