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Schlabach Writes Column on BCS, Bashes ND. Kittens and Puppies Put on Notice.

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Mark Schlabach of ESPN wrote a column about the BCS, and how the in-conference regular season should be used as a kind of playoff system for the BCS.  You know, it was fine and dandy in a this-isnt-the-real-world kind of way.  Until he took his shots at Notre Dame.

I mean, seriously, these guys can bring any topic back to bashing ND.  Hmmm, want to discuss globalthermonuclear war?  ESPN Analyst:  “Yes. Well…blah blah blah…blah blah…ND sucks.”  Throw out the migration patterns of one-legged manatees or the overrated-ness of Katie Holmes and you’ll get the same thing.

Here’s a taste of what Marky Mark had to say, and this is all he gets:

Because Notre Dame has the ability to schedule whichever opponents it sees fit, the Irish are all but guaranteed seven or eight victories each season.

Are you serious Biz Marky?  Seriously?  I’ll take the bottom 7 out of ANY conference over the same bottom 7 that ND schedules regularly.  We don’t schedule garbage teams from nowhere – we pick up USC, Penn State, Michigan and a host of Big Ten schools.  Are these easy games?  No!  And even if you take the ‘light’ portion of our schedule, go ahead and compare it to what some of these ‘good’ teams (tOSU, Michigan in the Big Ten) face in their conferences.  It’s a joke, not even a comparison!   ND’s schedule was ranked 20th in the nation this year.  And that’s the LOWEST it’s been in recent memory. Give me a break, man, and think up something original, something with some thought and research behind it. 

Otherwise, it’s going to be on you…cuz I’m getting mad, and I strapped on my boots…so any dogs….NO, puppies and kittens better be on lock, cuz I’m about pissed enough to kick one.  Hard.  And all because of you Marky Mark.  So go get smart somehow and come back and give us something better.  Else Fido and Fluffy might get hurt.

  +    +   = Marky’s Fault

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About The Biscuit

Founder, Head of Ranting
Don't take me, yourself, or life so seriously. This is supposed to be fun.

Biscuit co-founded HerLoyalSons in partnership with his ND roommate (Dillon Hall baby!), MQ, in 2006 and has been ranting about ND Football and everything Notre Dame since. He strongly believes in the mission of ND and its football program. Biscuit expects logic and data in arguments and will absolutely crush you if you come to a debate missing one or the other. He despises everything Michigan, and his favorite pastime is mocking Purdue.

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Comments

  1. gwzimm

    I sent Schlaback an email and attached a jukebox of the ND Victory march. He is a complete rectal orifice

  3. BurbankSteve

    I emailed that scumbag a few days ago also, but unlike every (real) journalist or editor I’ve ever emailed, he didn’t bother to reply.
    I guess he’s just toooooo important to worry about what people think of his drivel. I tried to cc the editors of ESPN.com, but guess what – they don’t publish their email addresses.

    Here’s the email, if any of you are interested:

    Dear Mr. Schlabach

    Your editors asked you to discuss one change you would like to see in college football, but you managed to devote 25% of your article to a rant against Notre Dame?

    I don’t have to try very hard to discover what your opinion of Notre Dame is (“as disliked as Notre Dame might be”), and I find your treatment of the facts regarding Notre Dame’s participation in the Bowl Conference Series egregiously misleading.

    You posit that Notre Dame are “all but guaranteed seven or eight victories a season” because they are not a member of a conference and can schedule their own opponents, but you conveniently fail to make any comparison with Notre Dame’s schedule and any other team. You suggest that the Big 10 is the “obvious choice” for the Irish – if you were fair, you would have considered the 2006 schedule of – let’s see – Michigan.

    Conference Games: Wisconsin, Minnesota, Michigan State, Penn State, Iowa, Indiana, Ohio State
    Non-Conference Games: Vanderbilt, Central Michigan, Notre Dame, Ball State.

    I don’t see a great strength-of-schedule disparity between Michigan and Notre Dame, do you?

    You then continue with more misleading statements regarding Notre Dame’s revenue distribution from the BCS, especially the statement that “the school receives $1 million from the BCS even if the Irish don’t qualify for one of college football’s biggest bowl games”. You state this as if Notre Dame in some way receives preferential treatment from the BCS, but you fail to mention that conference teams all receive revenue from the BCS. Some simple mathematics applied to the revenue distribution to each conference, and the number of teams in that conference, gives an answer that $1 million is probably the lowest amount paid to a single school.

    You agree that your diatribe reads very differently once a person is in possession of the facts that you conveniently omit.

    I’m surprised that your editor didn’t see fit to do his job and edit.

    I’d have copied John Papanek on this email, but ESPN.com doesn’t seem particulary keen to reveal any contact information for its editorial staff. I suppose they were getting tired of finding their inboxes full each morning.