Matt Zemek, blogger for Scout.com, and moral authority to us all, took Notre Dame to task, again, because taking Notre Dame to task is one of the 2 standard ways to ensure a lot of traffic to your "work," and thus a happy editor/employer. This time, he claims that not only has Notre Dame lost track of its Catholic identity, but Notre Dame is also hurting America. To quote the ignoramus, "The ultimate problem with Notre Dame football has less to do with the institution itself, and much more to ...
Things That Suck
Matt Zemek
Another Missive from the Enclave: Flagellum Equus Mortuus
Salve, Magisterium. I was visiting with Brother Bernard, the Enclave’s archivist, the other night and beneath the full, silvery moon, with the sound of his rare, red piglets squealing in the background, Brother Bernard passed on to me a rare and unsettling manuscript. For centuries the Enclave has gathered every piece of writing in existence. Not just work that has been published, mind you, but copies of every scrap and doodle on earth are gathered, catalogued, and archived by Brother ...
Forced to Make Millions of Dollars?
Sign it! Sign this huge contract so we may pay you a fortune! I'm not sure what will end first, this Dick-Rod-Not-Paying-His-Buyout thing or the Democratic Nomination process, but both have reached rarefied levels of stupidity. While Hillary Clinton is vowing to continue fighting, Dick Rod is claiming he was "coerced" into signing his West Virginia contract. Former West Virginia football coach Rich Rodriguez says Gov. Joe Manchin and three members of the university's board of ...
Dumbest Writer In The History of Communication Found
Holy Flaming Batsuits, Robin, I've found the dumbest writer in the history of communication. Illiterates probably berate this woman. Her ancestors, thousands of years ago, probably drew cave paintings of buffalo with which everyone else on the planet confused toucans. Her name is "Lisa H," and she "writes" a blog on FoxSports.com's community blogs. You know how they say a million monkeys with a million keyboards, given enough time, could write the works of Shakespeare? Well it would take ...
Fraudriguez Offered Job to Dude that Might Be Racist. Or Might Not. Could Be Though!
This really is just a confusing story on ESPN. I'm not really sure what the point is, and after reading it I think I only get about 50% of what's going on. I only post and comment on it to 1) point out again that DickRod somehow manages to get tangled up in messy stuff constantly. It's fun!   And 2) to mess with our loyal scUM reader or 2 out there. It just seems that Fraudy McFrauderson tends to associate with shady people.  This will not serve him well over ...
ND Reveals the Best “The Shirt” Design Since….Well…Ever.
So ND just spammed me about the new "The Shirt" for 2008 and I have to say, Wow. WOW. I mean, I am excited. Most years we have some horribly ugly and gaudy thing with some lame configuration of 9 different images all jammed into the back with a pithy saying like "shake down the thunder". Don't get me wrong - I like the tradition of The Shirt and that designs are based in long-loved and storied ND traditions. I love the ND pride inherent in The Shirt and the philanthropic nature of ...
Michigan (sucks!) Students Who Couldn’t Get Into Michigan (sucks!) Upset Over Ticket Policy
Reading this letter, I find myself wondering if University of Phoenix students who don't actually live in Phoenix have an inferiority complex. On behalf of the students of the University of Michigan at Flint (and also students at the Dearborn campus, I'd venture to say), I would like to express my utter disappointment in the recent change in purchasing priorities for Michigan football tickets. Under the new policy, priority will be given to University students attending the Ann Arbor campus ...
Fraudriguez to Public: Oh, God, Nobody Look!
The Michigan (sucks!) football team's intrasquad football practice will not be open to the public. The scrimmage, which will signify the end of spring practice under new coach Rich Rodriguez, will be held at Saline High School, about 10 miles from Ann Arbor. UM spokesman Dave Ablauf said the decision was made to close the scrimmage to the public because Saline’s stadium seating capacity – about 8,000 - was too small to accommodate an expected large crowd. Hrm. So 1000s would likely ...
Clearly, Rich Rodriguez is an Unmitigated Jerk
Why else would people keep leaving the Micigan (sucks!) program? I'm enjoying the tears with an Allagash White. Join us, wont you? ...
Brian Cook Has No Argument
I think Brian is broken. Normally he makes some effort. Sure, it's the sort of effort you see from a three-legged horse trying to pull a sleigh over ice or a Michigan (sucks!) football player taking an English Lit course, but it's still effort. This time, there was no effort. And it's sort of ruined our afternoon plans. I failed to notice that, before his reposting of his "Destroy Harbaugh" post on mgoblog, Brian posted this. I link because I don't care if he gets some traffic from HLS. ...