Recently, two Texas Tech players were bus-ted after burglarizing a local home. Specifically, they took some electronics gear - maybe a DVD player, or an Xbox360. You know, innocent kid stuff.     +    =  Ok okay Miami, I know what you think I'm going to say now. You thought I'd say "Hey, good job guys, way to go! Now let's play some Bond." Ummm, no, Miami. That's what your thug-hugging @$$'s would say. Texas Tech did exactly what a team should do when something ...
Notre Dame Football
How Can Anyone Follow This?
I have been impressed with Brady Quinn's play before, but how in the world he runs his offense with Weis calling the plays impresses me even more after watching some of the 60 Minutes clips. Here is Weis calling a play. Well, actually 3 plays and Quinn has to read which one to run based on the defensive coverage:  “I’m gonna run riot 35...then I’d like to go Z look go, if they pressure. So heavy right flip, alert zip, riot 35 z lookâ€. Are you kidding me? Quinn should win the ...
Nut Sacked!
EAST LANSING, Mich.--It's official. Spartan football coach John The Smith will not be retained after the 2006 season. It's over, Johnny. In honor of his great legacy and in preparation of his impending unemployment, HLS has compiled the following list of jobs which might be more suitable for a man of Smith's abilities: Howard Dean campaign manager Assist in the completion of Crazy Horse Memorial in South Dakota Intern: Bethlem Royal Hospital Backup singer for Gnarls ...
Spartans Call Press Conference to Consider Hiring Head Football Coach
EAST LANSING, Mich.--Jahn El Smythe's days in East Lansing may be numbered. And that number may be one. Michigan State has called a press conference to take place at 1:30 p.m. EST to "discuss the coaching situation." Possible coaching topics for the press conference were revealed exclusively to HLS. John L. Smith or Tom Cruise: Whose Issues are Bigger? Stumbling Upon Your Ass: Things to do When Looking for a Hole in the Ground Protecting the 50-Yard Line: The 35-Yard Line of ...
Kinchen Benched for Using 3rd Grade Language
ESPN benched ESPNU commentator Brian Kinchen after his recent remarks made during the NIU-Iowa game. Kinchen was describing how receivers need to have soft and "tender" hands to catch and "caress" the ball. His next sentence? "...that's kind of gay, but hey..."   During the next play Kinchen described a pass as "rad" and said that the receiver was "booking it" for the end zone. Then he wet-willied his co-announcer and told him he wouldn't be his Best Co-worker anymore if he ...
The Insane Bias Continues
So this week there were a few close calls. Close calls for Top 10 teams against unranked, unrespected opponents. In particular, Texas eaked out a win over lowly Texas Tech (5-4) in a comeback. What are the headlines?  Stuff like "Texas Proves it's a Winner", "McCoy Comes into His Own as a Leader", blah blah blah.  And Tennessee struggled with not-good South Carolina (5-3), pulling out a win there by a touch. This SC is also unranked. Again, glowing headlines about the Vols' "mettle" ...
SB Tribune vs. The World
National Media Outlet College Football Experts, Listen up. Eric Hansen, yes, THAT Eric Hansen, of the South Bend Tribune, owns your ass. Some people will never get past the Tyrone Willingham firing. Some people will never be able to get past the contract extension. Some people will resent him writing a book just a year into his head coaching career. Some people feel like they have to weigh in on every sound bite that comes out of Weis' mouth. And that's OK. But if you're going to do ...
domer.mq Shipwrecks on Tortuga. HLS Goes To Pot.
Ahoy! Being on this pirate isle, I saw about 20 seconds of the game yesterday because, well, it's Navy, and in 20 seconds we scored. Twice. That and time on this island is relative, and I have no idea to what. Anyway, dear readers, the HLS staff is, I'm sure, busy working on some excellent content today, so be sure to check back soon! I leave you with this thought: BBQ turtle. It rules. So too does rum. Mmmm... Rummy, rum, rum, rum. I love rum. I'm a pirate, bitches. ...
The University of Navy: We Can Be Dorks Too
Hey, I've got all the respect in the world for the Midshipmen, but when you make a video like this, it's bound to be posted on the internet for all to see... [youtube]5n9gfkNzY_s[/youtube] PS - Army wouldn't have used the floor mat. Oh Snap! UPDATE: Middies play with Legos. Which is ok. Legos rule. [youtube]kAqLpmlXziY[/youtube] ...
No You ND Haters, Chuck wasn’t Bitching.
You've all read the quotes on the AP wire or ESPN.com... "One of the teams (Tennessee) that jumped us had the same game that we had. They're down, they're playing at home and they win by a field goal. Another team (Florida) that jumped us wasn't even playing. They were home eating cheeseburgers and they end up jumping us. That befuddles me. …"Tell me how that works? Maybe I'm just stupid. Tell me how that works?" And I'm sure that all you ND haters (and therefore Weis haters because you wish ...