Dear Leadership Committee,
Congratualtions on being named to this committee. Being elected by your peers to such a committee is an honor, and no matter how this season turns out, you should be proud of that honor.
Last season, we, and many other fans of the Fighting Irish, noted a palpable lack of leadership on the team. We hope that situation resolves itself this season with the actions of your committee and those of the tri-captains. To help you prepare for your new role, we at HLS have compiled a list of great leaders in history, literature, lore, and cinema. Study these leaders, learn what makes them tick, come to understand how it is that these men became someone for other men to follow, and then apply the lessons you learn on and off the field.
- Leader: Hazel of Watership Down.
Leadership Attributes: Led with bravery, recognized the talents of his followers and used each accordingly, stood against the tyranny of fat rabbit General Woundwort, innovative rabbit mind.
Translated to the football field: Recognize your receivers. Realize that flag patterns inside the 10 probably aren’t going to work if your receiver is 5-10. Call a timeout. Discuss the situation with your coach and see if you can reach a compromise. Perhaps fill the receiver slot with one of those 6-5 guys instead. Also, he was a rabbit. Ever try to catch a rabbit? Tough as hell without a gun, and they usually don’t allow guns on football fields unless you’re in Florida. - Leader: William Wallace.
Leadership Attributes: Despite bloodlust, had the amazing ability to get other men to see clearly and to reach deep within themselves to hack their enemies into small, bloody bits. Wore excellent face paint. Had the confidence necessary to run in a kilt. Also, the bloodlust.
Translated to the football field: Remember, not all opponents are worth a lot of showiness. That scene where Wallace holds that small-time lord up against the post – the same one where Wallace’s love was murdered – and then, with only rage in his eyes and silence on his lips, dispatches the lord? That’s a man keeping his focus on the big picture. Do that with the likes of Purdue. Save your emotional juices for the bigger guys, like Southern Cal, Michigan, or UNC. Also, remember, blood-lust. - Leader: Captain Kidd.
Leadership Attributes: So fierce a man that he could take actual pirates, sign them up to hunt down other pirates, cross the seven seas and back again with said pirates, all the while barely actually paying them anything at all and not ever really giving them anything they were promised when they signed up – all, from what we can gather, because he had a firm grasp of the nebulous concepts that kept sea-dogs from killing and eating eachother, and, more importantly, killing and eating him.
Translated to the football field: Know your team. Remember that not all rules of management style apply to all teams. Know that some rules can never be forsaken. And don’t forget not to piss off the Queen. - Leader: Jesus.
Leadership Attributes: Always willing to sacrifice himself. Walked on water.
Translated to the football field: There’s going to be someone on the opposition that nobody else wants to tackle. You be the one to tackle that guy. You be the one that breaks through the wall on kickoffs. You be the one that doesn’t let a little water keep you from getting where you want to go. - Leader: Michael Jackson.
Leadership Attributes: Always innovative, never afraid to try something different while still holding onto his roots. Born in Gary, Indiana, and yet not eaten by wolves or locals. Could get torched on occasion, but would come back better than ever.
Translated to the football field: When life gets you down, and you feel like your hair is on fire, just remember, it can always get more interesting. - Leader: Admiral Ackbar.
Leadership Attributes: Let his entire team know “It’s a trap!”
Translated to the football field: Always yell out “trap!” if you see a trap. - Leader: Henry V
Leadership Attributes: Had one hell of a pep talk prepared.
Translated to the football field: You’ll need one eventually, so go ahead and draft up some notes so you, too, have one hell of a pep talk prepared. - Leader: Ronald Reagan.
Leadership Attributes: Stood up to the most terrifying power in the world with the confidence that he could be more terrifying. Always seemed “just crazy enough to try it.” Seemed to have a lot of really good jokes at the ready.
Translated to the football field: It’s okay if the opponent worries you a little bit, just make sure you worry them more. And when things get a little too tense, have a good one liner ready to loosen everyone up a bit. - Leader: Ronald Speirs.
Leadership Attributes: Relieved former Easy Company commander of duty at Foy, and, purportedly, while doing so, ran right through the Germans in order to re-establish communications with ally forces on opposite end of battlefield. Also, allegedly, shot one of his sergeants for disobeying a direct order. Also, very allegedly, gunned down 10-20 POWs at Normandy after D-Day because trying to keep them as prisoners would be detrimental to the success of the invasion. Never really did much to dissuade anyone that any of these allegations actually took place.
Translated to the football field: It’s okay to be a crazy S.O.B. if you’re really good at what you do. Also, it’s great for your command to have plenty of fear of you mixed in with their love of you.
That should just about fill up your tank with premium, unleaded inspiration, dear leaders. Please, ignore for the moment that all but one of these examples of great leadership is dead.
Go Irish,
Her Loyal Sons
- HLS Tweets for the Week of 2009-11-15 - November 15, 2009
- HLS Tweets for the Week of 2009-11-08 - November 8, 2009
- HLS Tweets for the Week of 2009-11-01 - November 1, 2009
The Biscuit
You used Reagan as a leader!!! He’s political! You right wing uber-conservative fascist pig! (I just thought I’d get that out there before some other overly sensitive tool posted it)
trey
Just for biscuit then:
Leader: Bill Clinton.
Leadership Attributes: Cool, quick witted, and money in the pressure situations. Doesn’t always have the best resources at his disposal, but always could make something out of nothing.
Translated to the football field: Sometimes, you’re going to get caught with your pants down. That’s ok, just make sure you know enough about your job to react in the high stress moments. And hey, sometimes, you just need to have a good ol **** measuring to trump your opponent.
Bad Kermit
Coincidentally, I’m reading Watership Down right now. I never got around to it in grade school.
The Biscuit
Trey, you bleeding heart liberal tree hugger!!!
domer.mq
I’m not sure if I ever read it, BK. I may only remember the movie. I’m almost positive I remember the movie, as I’m pretty sure it scarred me the same way The Dark Crystal scarred me. Anyway, Fr. Birdonnell reminded me of the rabbits.
Bad Kermit
That movie (and Dark Crystal) were absolutely horrifying. Kid movies used to be really disturbing back in the day. It’s a wonder I’m so well-adjusted.
Subway Domer
Bravo! Bravo! Bravo!
Great post! Remember: Bloodlust.
mark
Great Watership down reference!
The Biscuit
I read the book. And I loooooved Dark Crystal. Disturbing? Nah. Just – weird.
trey
Biscuit, you are a despicable grey-colored, no good/not bad NEUTRALIST!!!!
nyndfansub
well said in all aspects. However, admiral ackbar has brought a lot more to the table than just stating “its a trap”. the ‘man?’ knew the weak points of the defense (i.e. the 2 meter wide thermal exhaust port) and knew how to exploit… im such a nerd. GO IRISH!?
Jeanne Daniel
fabulous resrch man