June 13, 2008

Friday Roundup: The “Semi-Homemade Edition”

domer.mq

I recently just got cable TV for the first time in many years, so naturally I’ve been watching every episode of “Good Eats” and “Myth Busters” I could find. “Hey, this one’s translated in Korean and I’ve no idea what they’re trying to disprove, but they’re gonna blow something up!”

Anyway, while enjoying this sudden audio/visual influx of stimulus, I’ve also found myself constantly colliding with this woman:



I know what you’re thinking, “Hey! A hot blond with food! Yum!” But no. This here is Sandra Lee, and she’s the freaking Ron Zook of the culinary world. She’s the host of this monstrosity called “Semi-Homemade with Sandra Lee” on Food Network, and she and that show are the worst thing to happen to food since Rosie O’Donnell. My God, Cool Whip!? She’s going to use Cool Whip and tell us everyone we care about will think we’ve spent hours preparing these dishes? So help me, if I ever use Cool Whip in a recipe it’s time to just leave the parade, walk off into the woods, and let the wolves have me.

Oh yeah, and that photo is a total fake too. She usually looks like the resident cougar but with mom-jeans*.

The Roundup:

Finally, a big welcome to our newest contributor, Father Birdonell. We recruited him heavily in the off-season, and we’re thrilled to get this top talent in the fold. His mix of mental agility, typing speed, and quick, cutting wit is just what this team needed. We’re also really excited about his ability to fast-track absolution.

*I admit, she looks pretty hot in that pic.


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2 Comments

At June 13th, 2008 at 4:40 pm, Face Mask said...

Right! Coolwhip is out. I’d give her 3 months to quit giving me coolwhip then I’d call the Hong Kong police.

At June 13th, 2008 at 5:38 pm, The Biscuit said...

dude. pumpkin pie is the TOPPING to cool whip. that stuff is like soft, fluffy Crack. i dig it.

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