How DID Michigan Get to SUCK!!! So Bad?
The Biscuit - 3:43 am
More specifically, how did they get to this point? Don’t get me wrong, Michigan has always always always sucked. But this is just getting ridiculous. How’d they get here? Let’s review.
First, they hired a Dick. Literally. Just a big shady Dick that shreds his former program’s docs. Just a huge scummy Dick that pays you back 37.5 cents when you lend him a buck. A big ole Dick that cleaned house, firing the entire UM staff.
So then what? His players leave. I mean, they all leave.
So what’s a Dick to do? I mean, he did his best Urban impression, but still needs ‘athletes’ for his squad. What does this Dick do?
He oh-so-desperately holds open tryouts. 19 year old tuba players are lining up for d-line. Juniors that last played in middle school are sweet Running Back prospects.
Sad.
So apparently, these are the “Champions of the West” taking the field next year:
Victors Valiant my ass. The day #38 there hits the hole and powers through for a 4 yard gain is the day that Michigan football has truly made history.
Awesome. Dick gets what he deserves.
trey
Ever see “The Waterboy?” Remember when scUM used their towel boy at QB to mimic that? Yeah, thats #21 in the background.
February 16, 2008 at 10:02 amFace Mask
Well,when your hot,your hot.Or a Dick buy anyother name would still stink.
February 16, 2008 at 10:03 amKentAllard
Great post!
February 16, 2008 at 5:39 pmScott
It’s not suprising to me that a Notre Dame fan would write a blog with the two major subjects being sucking and Dick….Go Big BLUE!!!!
February 16, 2008 at 6:35 pmThe Biscuit
Ummm, Scott. It’s about UM sucking. And UM’s Dick. You’re confused. UM education clearly isn’t focused on reading comprehension. Course, we already knew that.
February 16, 2008 at 8:28 pmTommy O
This entire ordeal has really got me thinking. People on various boards and blogs have set numbers of games Weis needs to win this year to retain his job in their minds. If this clusterfuck at Michigan has shown anything, it’s that hiring a coach can be an arduous, damaging process. In personal conversations, I’m going to demand that somebody who says Weis should be fired name 3 people who are ready and willing to come to Notre Dame who they think can do a better job. I recommend others do the same.
February 17, 2008 at 10:42 pmdomer.mq
Tommy O,
I agree. It’s a vastly more difficult exercise to hire a great coach today than it was even just 15 years ago. The big, name brand programs (and yes, Michigan (sucks!) is a brand name program) can’t take for granted that some great coaches are great at their particular programs for a reason, and it might not just transfer to another school. That said, Weis does have to show “success” this year. “Progress.” What that means? I’m not quite yet ready to answer that.
February 18, 2008 at 12:14 amThe Biscuit
Tommy, the pretentious toolbags that say stuff like “Anything less than X wins next year is unacceptable” are just that – toolbags. Who are these ‘fans’ to demand a certain performance a year before a season starts? Yes, we sucked last year and yes a lot of it was Charlie’s fault. But we all know not all of it. And I have no clue how these ‘fans’ think they can somehow demand anything. It’s ludicrous. We’re fans. We have no power…
February 18, 2008 at 2:30 amFace Mask
Not so fast my friend.While I agree that placing a win X or else demand is not only asinine but impossible I do think the fan base is very powerful.The power is in the almighty dollar and where and with whom they spend it.Notre Dame has the most powerful fan base in college football and rivals most pro. teams aswell.If there was no fan base ND would still be playing sand lot ball with the local High schools.
February 18, 2008 at 12:35 pmDeepTeaKup
I bet #38 could still go for 120 yards against ND though.
February 18, 2008 at 4:54 pmdomer.mq
It’s the head-band that does it for ya, right DTK?
February 18, 2008 at 9:38 pmSir John
I agree with you guys. Per “firing” Weis, even if he gets his 10 years, seeing how he is pillared, shedded and i nsulted in the press, who in their right mind would want to take on the HC job at ND after Weis????
February 19, 2008 at 6:20 amDeepTeaKup
Domer, I actually thought about writing a serious response to this post but then I realized that it had to be a joke.
re: 38, yeah it’s the headband and that stone cold glare that make me think this kid could be something special.
Also, take a look at #21, does he not remind you fo Desmond Howard?
February 19, 2008 at 11:31 amThe Biscuit
DTK, I would’ve had much less respect for your wit-o-meter if you’d responded seriously.
42 looks intense. I can see him as a Free Safety making all the right reads.
February 19, 2008 at 11:35 amdomer.mq
DTK,
What they failed to mention is that none of those jerseys were really distributed by the program to the “players.” They all just showed up dressed that way.
I’m loving the “good, athletic stance” of the kid behind Richie Rich. No doubt he’ll explode out of that stance.
February 19, 2008 at 10:23 pmdomer.mq
Biscuit,
DTK’s Canadian – Every thing’s funny to him in a bemused sort of way.
February 19, 2008 at 10:26 pmBlue Fan
Typical Whining Irish bulls@$t! Yeah, we suck, but we beat you guys -again – for the third time in 4 years. 2006 was especially fun, coming into your place and handing your asses to you. You guys are so pathetic. Try winning a bowl game more than once in eight tries.
April 13, 2010 at 8:02 am