Because Charlie Weis is a closer.

The Notre Dame Football Program signed 23 members of the recruiting class of 2008. 23 very highly regarded players. So highly regarded, in fact, that Notre Dame various publications have ranked the Notre Dame class the #1 class in the nation. And all after a season during which the Irish garnered only 3 wins. That, ladies and gentlemen, is impressive.

So how did he and Corwin Brown and the rest of the staff do it? Last night, on Adam Nettina’s radio show, I was asked that question, and I did a terribly rushed job of answering it, but the short answer is: Charlie knows team chemistry. And he knows it because while he was in New England, the Patriots practically defined the term “team chemistry.” He knows how to mix individuals together in the right way so that they don’t just work well together, they bond together. And he knows how to create buy-in to the program just like the Patriots do in order to get certain guys to set aside their egos. And he also knows how to develop close relationships with the recruits. Plus, I’ve got to imagine he must stick out to a lot of recruits, particularly “Notre Dame Men” types, and parents. He’s extremely frank. Most of the recruits who signed with Notre Dame today mention all the time about Charlie being “open,” “honest,” and “frank.” There are a lot more coaches out there just telling anyone and everyone whatever they want to hear (cough-urban-cough-meyer-cough). That sort of thing sticks with you.

Anyway, without much further ado, we present the 2008 Notre Dame Football Recruiting Class (Note: The content below is best read as if it were the scene in a Michael Bay movie where 23 characters are quickly introduced so that we can just go ahead and get to the action and violence already. Feel free to pop in the soundtrack to The Rock or Bad Boys before continuing.):

Deion Walker, WR, Christchurch, VA (4 stars): In a few years, they’ll say, “Maurice Stovall? Yeah. He was sort of like Deion Walker.”

Trevor Robinson, OG, Elkhorn, NE (4 stars): If Charlie Weis was looking to just recruit “nasty” rather than develop it, then Trevor Robinson is the prototype. Extremely quick off the ball with the ability to make linebackers ask for a breather.

Jonas Gray, RB, Beverly Hills, MI (4 stars): If you drew a picture of a star college running back, and you didn’t suck at drawing, then he’d probably look a lot like Jonas. Very quick and good size means he could run around you, and you’d best hope he does.

Michael Floyd, WR, Saint Paul, MN (5 stars): Years from now, when Michael meets former opponents, he’ll have to turn his back to them and pretend he’s running into the end zone so they’ll recognize him.

Steve Filer, LB, Chicago, IL (4 stars): My plan is to nickname him “The Wall,” because he’s so good at getting to the point of attack that opponents will come to believe you can’t get around him.

Dan McCarthy, S, Youngstown, OH (4 stars): We could really get used to members of the McCarthy blood-line playing for the Irish. Dan’s on the road to full recovery from surgery on a slipped-disk, but once he’s on the field he’ll have opponents hoping for a full recovery of their own.

Ethan Johnson, DT, Portland, OR (5 stars): Doomed to having to apologize to his teammates after games for “hogging all the tackles,” Ethan may have to take the linebackers out to dinner on occasion so there are no hard feelings.

Jamoris Slaughter, S, Tucker, GA (4 stars): Not long from now, we’ll hold Jamoris singularly responsible for an onslaugh(er) of terrible puns by play-by-play men and sports news anchors.

Robert Blanton, CB, Matthews, NC (4 stars): Robert had 7 picks and 147 tackles… in his sophomore year in high school. Now he’s about to prove that class-year doesn’t matter in college either.

Brandon Newman, DT, Louisville, KY (4 stars): By his sophomore year, he’ll show that DTs don’t have to just “make it easy for the linebacker” in a 3-4; they can annihilate QBs just like anybody else.

Lane Clelland, OG, Owings Mills, MD (3 stars): Lane tends to play football as though the game were really called, “Kill Someone.” We like that. We like that a lot.

Hafis Williams, DT, Elizabeth, NJ (3 stars): When Knute Rockne said, “We’re going inside of ‘em, we’re going outside of ‘em — inside of ‘em! outside of ‘em! — and when we get them on the run once, we’re going to keep ‘em on the run.” he was really just warning future opposing QBs of Hafis. I’m calling it right now: Zorich Part Deux.

Darius Fleming, LB, Chicago, IL (4 stars): In high school, after Darius would make a play, the stadium announcer wouldn’t bother to announce his name. Everyone always assumed it was Darius that made the play anyway. They were right.

Joseph Fauria, TE, Encino, CA (4 stars): Presents opposing defensive ends with a terrible proposition: He’s either going to block you into the mud or force you to cover all 6′7″ and 250lbs of him. Either way, they lose.

Dayne Crist, QB, Sherman Oaks, CA (5 stars): So many student-produced t-shirts, so little time. By his Junior year, the Heisman Trophy will be begging Dayne to win.

Anthony McDonald, LB, Sherman Oaks, CA (4 stars): It’s inevitable. Brent Musberger will eventually utter the words, “And leading this all-everything linebacker corps is the defense’s own QB: Anthony McDonald.”

David Posluszny, LB, Aliquippa, PA (3 stars): His brother played for Penn State and was highly regarded. David will play for Notre Dame and become a legend.

Kyle Rudolph, TE, Cincinnati, OH (5 stars): Already rated the #1 TE in the country in this recruiting class, Mel Kiper’s already getting a spot reserved for him in the 2011 draft board.

Sean Cwynar, DT, Woodstock, IL (4 stars): Soon, “Cwynar” will be less “name” and more “verb,” as in, “That QB just got Cwynared.”

Braxston Cave, C, Mishawaka, IN (4 stars): He’s been a leader off the field during this entire recruiting process. No reason that should change once he’s on the field.

John Goodman, WR, Fort Wayne, IN (4 stars): The next great Notre Dame receiver to make young, white boys believe that they too could one day be the next great Notre Dame receiver.

Kapron Lewis-Moore, DE, Weatherford, TX (3 Stars): Born to make offensive tackles look dumb, he’s also developed an ability to make QBs cry.

Michael Golic, OG, West Hartford, CT (3 stars): Plans to make us all completely forget about his father ever having played for Notre Dame. In 3 years, most people wont know that “Junior” is “Junior.”

If you haven’t already done the math, this is an absolutely astounding class. It’s not just full of extraordinarily high-quality players, it’s a class that fills a lot of areas of need, particularly at the DL, LB, TE, and WR positions. There’s a good generation or two of Notre Dame fans who have no idea what this level of talent, the level that Weis has recruited the last few years, even looks like on the field, but they will soon. Congratulations to Charlie and his staff on earning their coffee today. And congratulations to these young men in joining the Notre Dame family!

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