We cannot confirm that Wannstedt tore his Achilles while practicing the ballet.

Pittsburgh, PA - Dave “The Stache” Wannstedt, the head coach of the Pitt Football Team, tore his Achilles tendon yesterday and had surgery done to repair it. As part of a “two-fer” deal, Wannstedt also had arthroscopic knee surgery. As a result, Wannstedt will be getting around on a motorized scooter and coaching this weekend’s game against Cincinnati from the press box.

Given that fellow Pennsylvania collegiate football coach Joe Paterno has plenty of experience “coaching” from the press box, and given that Paterno also has lots of experience driving around in motorized scooters, and given that Paterno also has lots of experience terrorizing pedestrians while driving, it is believed that Wannstedt will contact Paterno for hints and tips sometime this week.

There is no word on whether or not Wannstedt owns a Tivo.

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