Thanks to the guys at BGS for pointing this one out. In their look back on the history of the Ron Zook drama, they came across a piece by Mark Tupper of the Decatur Herald & Review. We’re not going to link it as per our policy that people with the IQ of a dog biscuit do not get links. However, BGS has a link, and we’ll link to them because they’re pretty smart fellas, so if you want to read the whole piece, start there. (BGS’ own write-up is very well worth the read, by the way.)

Anyway, here are some highlights (?) from the piece. Bold is mine.

Postings on college football message boards carried out similar finger-pointing and, as too often happens with blathering on the Internet, they took on a life of their own.

Of course, all of these accusations had one thing in common: They were delivered under the cowardly cloak of anonymity.

It turns out, however, that knowledgeable people with resources and the right legal knowledge can track these so-called anonymous Internet postings. And so when Guenther hired an Indianapolis law firm more than two months ago to probe the source of these accusations, the process began to zero in on the author.

Uh, no. It’s actually pretty much impossible to track such things down. We’ll agree, it is cowardly, but to actually pinpoint the source of any accusations made on a message board without any level of, oh, let’s say reasonable doubt, is impossible. That’s especially true if these “knowledgeable people” do not have access to logs from a website to indicate things like an IP address. And that’s something you’d have to compel the owners of the site to supply. How, exactly, would Illinois go about doing that?

Even though there was absolutely nothing more than vague innuendo, the story provided more inflammatory material aimed at Zook.

By then, and as national signing date arrived on Wednesday, whispers about Zook and foul play were filling newspapers and providing juicy content for sports talk shows from coast to coast.

And on Thursday, Zook was in Chicago, doing a media blitz in which he offered himself up to answer any and every question on the subject.

Again, I have to ask, what are the accusations? There must be some because “Zook was in Chicago, doing a media blitz in which he offered himself up to answer any and every question on the subject.” Why? What were the questions? I’ve seen these pieces in the Chicago media. We never hear any actual questions. They just intro the piece, mentioning that there are a lot of questions floating around, and then they play a clip of Zook going “Aw, shucks. I don’t know why this is all happening to poor, little ole’ me.” Indeed, Zook and the Illini are putting on a media blitz to defend themselves against some ethereal notion of “questions floating around.” And again, I ask, why so jumpy, Zook?

Zook says he’s done nothing improper, that hard work and years of developing relationships in areas like Washington, D.C., Florida, Ohio and now here in Illinois, are paying off, as they always have for him. And although Zook said he would not address the specifics of the situation on Wednesday, he and Guenther both have promised it will be addressed publicly.

Yeah. I’m waiting. They’ve been acting like they know exactly who dunnit since last Wednesday. Why does it take a week to out their accusers then? And why are people within the Illinois program the only people who seem to have any idea of what the specific accusations were?

OK, here’s what needs to happen and what will happen:

As soon as Guenther has the results of the law firm’s investigative work, he needs to come forward and identify the source of the original postings. We’re all going to find that the author has an agenda closely tied to another university.

Expect Guenther to speak very soon.

While doing so, Guenther needs to strongly defend his football coach, which he will.

Then, the New York Times needs to revisit the subject, vindicating Zook and pointing a harsh finger at the real culprit. My guess is that won’t happen, nor will TV personality Regis Philbin, a blithering Notre Dame mouthpiece, apologize for his comment this week (”Isn’t that fishy?”) made to explain why Irish coach Charlie Weis had not been able to pad an already strong recruiting class with players like Illini-bound Benn and Wilson.

And here’s another thing you can count on: There will be a mad scramble of denials attempting to place distance between any school and the author of the original message. That will be fun to watch.

Ah! Some promises! Excellent. Who exactly gave Mark the authority to speak on Illinois’ behalf? What relationship does Mark have with Illinois? Further, if he has the authority to speak on Illinois’ behalf, then what’s he trying to say by calling Regis Philbin (a Notre Dame alum and fan), a “blithering Notre Dame mouthpiece?” Also, isn’t it reasonable to wonder if something’s fishy when it just doesn’t make any sense? Finally, the allegations by Illinois and their mouthpiece, Mark Tupper, seems to be that someone said something that wasn’t nice about the Illinois football program on a website. News Flash, Mark and Illinois, most of these websites have no official relationship with any programs. We have no official relationship with Notre Dame. But here’s something mean about the Illinois football program, just for kicks: The Illini suck and their coach is an incompetent who’s days would be better spent selling used cars. There. Direct your allegations at me, idiots.

Ironically, this could turn out to be a decidedly positive episode for Zook and the Illini.

Because of the attacks, it has prompted Zook to provide a more open look into his recruiting practices.

That would be ironic. And no it hasn’t. But hey, a lawsuit might really open things up. I don’t suppose Illinois will actually bring a lawsuit, however. That might get uncomfortable for them.

Reporters have talked to recruits, to high school coaches, to parents, to friends. And they’re all finding out the same thing: Zook and his staff are really, really, really good recruiters. They have been for many years. He has always been regarded as one of the premier recruiters in the nation, which is how he managed to recruit 22 of the 24 players who started on Florida’s national championship team this year.

If that’s the case, then someone should hire him as a recruiting coordinator, because he absolutely sucks as a head coach. (Oops. I guess that was another mean thing said about the Zooker on a website.)

That Zook is a master recruiter should come as no surprise, and I’m sure it embarrasses some to find out he’s better than the people running programs with far, far more on-field success.

Actually, it comes as a shock. But it just goes to prove that 17 and 18 year old kids can’t be trusted to do what’s best for themselves. I’ll let some economists chew on that one.

Zook will get through this. The university’s own NCAA compliance team, which numbers six full-time members and already is regarded as one of the most thorough in the country, keeps unbelievably close tabs on all of the school’s coaches. And the law firm Guenther hired will uncover the real culprit and the true motivation behind these venomous accusations.

It just shouldn’t be this costly and complicated to fight off gutless, agenda-minded attackers who don’t have the courage to sign their name, which tells me that for the New York Times to follow through on their original story, someone with a real name working for a real university likely encouraged it all to happen.

Yeah. That’s logical. The New York Times did an investigative piece on a story that makes even Illinois’ own alums raise an eyebrow, and yet, somehow, they could have only been spurred on to do the piece by some malicious official from another program. Mark could prove to be right in this case, but if all he’s using are his “powers of deduction,” then I suggest that he head on over to Illinois’ campus and sign up for a logic course or two.

And finally, I provide Mark’s picture from his column below because I’m not a very nice person and Mark looks like an enormous tool.

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