Worst. BCS. Ever.

You know that one guy at work that does stupid shit all the time? The guy that is represented by the "O Face" guy in Office Space. Yeah. Him. That's the BCS. Just when you think he can't get any dumber, he does something to best himself. Never fails.

The BCS just bested itself. Just when you thought the idea of Boston College in the BCS as a "league champion" was about as stupid as you could get, they go and create the following matchups:

• Fiesta Bowl: Boise State/Oklahoma - The battle of the never-shoulda-beens. Boise State should never be in a BCS bowl because, well, they're just not a BCS team, and as such, don't play a BCS team's schedule. Then again, neither does most of the SEC. Hey now! And then there's the Big 12's representative: Oklahoma. A team that lost it's starting QB and Heismonic running back. That's the Big 12 representative. If Texas isn't off in a corner sobbing itself to sleep, they really ought to be.
• Orange Bowl: Louiseville/Wake Forest - A game between the the Big East Champ, where it's not so much who won more, but who lost less, and the ACC Champ, otherwise known as "damn, can you believe Reggie Ball sucks so much that this team isn't named Georgia Tech?"
• Rose Bowl: Michigan/USC - The Concilliatory Giant Tootsie Roll game. Sorry you couldn't win football's equivalent of balancing popcorn boxes, you chokers. Here! Have a 15 pound tootsie roll! Maybe a few of your totally pissed off fans will tune in while they sharpen their sepuku blades.
• Sugar Bowl: Notre Dame/LSU - Any bowl game with Notre Dame in it is a good matchup. Just ask television execs. And while we look forward to whupping up on the LSU Tigers, we feel bad for the city of New Orleans. This was an opportunity to bring in a ridonculous amount of hotel/restaraunt/beer revenue. Now, without an "out of town" opponent for the Irish, they lose out on a major portion of, at least, hotel revenues. Hey, at least Irish fans should be able to book their rooms without a problem!
• BCS Title Game: Florida/tOSU - Sweet Jayzus. A year ago we saw what Jim Tressel can do with a lot of time to prepare. They made it clear that they were probably the best team playing "right now" and they did it against Charlie Weis. And they've continued to do it thru pretty much the entire year. Sure, their schedule gets a bit doughy looking at points, but they went ahead and took it to another top-5 program in the biggest game to ever happen. Ever. And they beat Texas back when Colt McCoy could feel his finger tips most of the time. Florida beat... well, Florida's only lost one game. And then there's the whole "ooooh, we're the SEC champs." Big F-ing deal. Go look at the SEC OOC schedule. Is it that the SEC defenses are so good, or that the SEC offenses are so sucky? I pick the later. And with a month to prepare, tOSU is gonna make Urban Meyer's "system" look like the winged-T, highschool rip-off that it is. It's going to be brutal. Brutally boring. tOSU beat Miami to win a national championship back before Miami went full-steam ahead into suckyville. And back then he had almost no QB. Now he has College Football's best athlete to eventually be selected late in the 2nd round. You do the math.

So not only did the BCS system manage to NOT actually pit the 2 best teams in the country against eachother for the championship game, the BCS managed to put together the worst-case-scenario schedule. And that's the fault of the BCS "system." Because that system has enough rules and provisions to be confused with a trade embargo. Barry "I Still Call Donna Shalala A Friend" Alvarez actually had a great idea: Put the 10 best teams in the BCS. Nut, meet Blind Squirrel. Of course, ND would qualify. Yup.

On that note, I end with a twist on a classic joke: What do Cheerios and the LSU Tigers have in common? Neither belong in a BCS game.

Oh Snap!

Worst. BCS. Bowl. Game. Joke. Ever.