“Updated: Nov. 7, 2006, 1:34 PM ET
Even an unbeaten Big East team seems Miami boundBy Gene Wojciechowski
ESPN.com
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Louisville fan: Whooee!! We’re going to the BCS championship! All Coach P — Petrino, not Pitino — and the boys have to do is beat that team with those Radio Shack logos on their helmets, then beat South Florida, then Pittsburgh, then Connecticut, then keep Coach P from secretly flirting with an NFL team or some money-whipping college program, and we’ll be in Glendale, Ariz., come Jan. 8!

Me: You sure?

Son, you fall off the top bunk one too many times? Of course we’re going. We’d be 12-0. It’ll be us against Ohio State or Michigan.

Just because you’re undefeated doesn’t make you the second-best team in the country.

They got cable TV where you live? We just got done performing a loss transplant on West Virginia, which, by the way, was ranked No. 3 at the time.

Saw it. Also saw your defense give up 34 points and 540 total yards, including 318 on the ground: 156 to a running back playing with one good hand, and 125 to a quarterback playing on one good ankle.

Maybe you saw our offense too — the one scoring 30 of our 44 points. We did that against the No. 12-ranked defense in the country.

You did that against a West Virginia defense that had faced Marshall (44th out of 119 in total offense), Maryland (95th), East Carolina (51st), Mississippi State (104th), Syracuse (112th), UConn (77th) and Eastern Washington (77th out of 119 in Division I-AA). The Mountaineers were the 12th-best defense in the country like Borat really has a son named Hooeylewis.”