You’ve all read the quotes on the AP wire or ESPN.com…

“One of the teams (Tennessee) that jumped us had the same game that we had. They’re down, they’re playing at home and they win by a field goal. Another team (Florida) that jumped us wasn’t even playing. They were home eating cheeseburgers and they end up jumping us. That befuddles me. …”Tell me how that works? Maybe I’m just stupid. Tell me how that works?”

And I’m sure that all you ND haters (and therefore Weis haters because you wish you had him) went off on how our great big coach is a great big whiner.  That he should shut his trap and quit complaining.  But Charlie isn’t like that.  And John Walters over at NBC has the FULL story:

In truth, for those of us in attendance, it was a funny moment. The writer who asked the question was the AP reporter Tom Coyne. The sentence that Coyne did not include in his piece was was the next thing Weis said. The ND coach looked directly at Coyne and said wryly, “You’re on the AP, tell me how that works.”

Everyone in the room laughed. [M]ore often than not it’s difficult to appreciate the context of the quote unless you are there or unless you hear it in its enitirety.

If you only read the AP story, you may think that Weis has an agenda, that he’s bitching because the Irish are falling further and further out of the BCS championship game picture. But listen to what he said immediately after Coyne answered his question by saying, “I don’t get a vote.”

Here’s Weis:  “Hey — let’s be very practical here, okay. Would I love for Notre Dame to play for the National Championship this year? Absolutely. Is it a chance that it happens? Remote. Is there a chance? Yeah, there’s a chance because any team with one loss has a chance of playing for it.

Other than that, what’s the next thing you want? Well, you’d like to play in one of the big games. So what do you have to do? Then you have to win. That’s what you have to do. If you win, things usually end up taking care of themselves.”

So calm down playa-hatahs.  Chuck is all good.  As usual.

Share This

• Quinn Likely to Delay Scout Workout until ND’s Pro Day
• Oldie - 1 / Charlie Haters - 0
• ND Didn’t Play Anyone? Puh-lease.

Who?

Freddie Mitchell. The other guy playing receiver for the Philadelphia Eagles back when T.O. inexplicably still hadn’t destroyed that franchise. Who knew Freddie “Gator Arms” Mitchell had played for UCLA? UCLA fans didn’t even know this.

Freddie Mitchell, seen here, yet again letting a ball pass thru his hands as he hears footsteps.

Anyway, Freddie wasn’t a very well-behaved visitor to ND Stadium:

By the 3rd quarter, this a-hole was pointing at UCLA fans in other sections and gloating over 4 yard runs. How the mighty have fallen.

While we at HLS hope that one day the Las Vegas medical examiner dictates Freddie’s C.O.D. as “Internal Bleeding Caused by 8,000 Point-blank Hits With Paint-Ball Guns,” we’re proud of the way that ND fans handled it. The guy just ain’t worth manslaughter charges.

Share This

• T.O. Spat out of Hell by Devil
• Go JEFF, GO GO GO GO!!! YEAH YEAH YEAH BABY YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!
• OSU/UM Most Watched Game Ever…

SOUTH BEND Friday evening, in front of thousands of spectators, Notre Dame golden boy Paul Hornung made a true statement about his love of the game. The “Where’s My Pants?” game, that is. Hornung celebrated the 50th anniversary of his Heisman award by giving a heartfelt speech at the Notre Dame-UCLA pep rally. His pants celebrated by dropping down to his ankles.

All records at the Where’s My Pants Hall of Fame were previously dominated by game pioneers Bad Kermit, ChisND and Peej. With one desperate, last-minute maneuver, Hornung now owns them all, including “Exposing yourself in front of the most policemen,” “Most racist underwear,” and “Biggest racing stripe.”

Although the league will not officially condone the abuse of celebrity status for Hall of Fame gain, they will not condemn Hornung ’s actions either. During a press conference earlier today, WMPL chairman J.P. Montufar said that “True, not everybody gets the opportunity to play in front of thousands. But his pants had to drop from way above his bellybutton! That’s some major points in distance alone. I think that Geriatric Where’s My Pants is this millennium’s Shuffleboard.”

You can watch a crappy video of the incident at the following link:
http://www.nbcsports.com/cfb_notredame/index.html?qs=;tab=videos , but you will probably try to buy a gun and then look for the guy responsible for inventing the podium.

Share This

• NC State Wants Johnson
• Friday Roundup: The “Good Bye Paul” Edition
• “Chris Donald Recruiting Video,” Or “How QBs Learned to Start Worrying and Crap Their Pants”

Playboy is coming to UCF, and if it doesn’t use this guy in at least one of the UCF girls’ spreads in the upcoming “Girls of Conference USA” pictorial, Hef has really lost it.

Bonus points for having a girl named “Watwood” quoted in the article. Watwood? ‘Dis wood!

Share This

• Quinn NFL Pro Day Video
• How DID Michigan Get to SUCK!!! So Bad?
• Leinart is a Father (Resisting Headline Including “Bush Push”)

DTK, a UM Fan (may God have mercy on him), had some things to say about my post below on how the media and the Pollsters view ND’s performances.  In particular, I have taken offense at how they always point back to our whupping by the Wolverines (and yes, I admit it was a whupping) as to why we should be lower in the polls.  And my argument isn’t that it was not a whupping, but that we get penalized for such a whupping more than other teams have. 

Ivan Maisel, in his ESPN.com column today, does it again.  Compare the two lines below. They describe two top 11 teams that had close wins this weekend:

Team A: Team A needed a turnover. Corner Player 1 produced it. A novice kicker prevailed in terrible weather conditions. That pretty much defines “knowing how to win.”

Team B: Great comeback by Team B. Great spirit, great desire, great execution. But what was Team B doing trailing Team C?

Now those two situations are very similar if you eliminate the team’s names.  Both were tight games against relatively lowly opponents, with a win pulled out in the last seconds.  Team A is Texas, and Team B is ND.  (If you can’t figure out Team C, you should spend some time looking in the mirror.)  It really comes down to how things are described, written about and spread.  One team “knows how to win” while the other shouldn’t be behind in the first place?  Why was Texas behind? Were they SUPPOSED to be behind? Didn’t ND show that it knew how to win by, ummm, WINNING?

Well, you say, that’s a fair analysis.  I’d say yeah, fair on both accounts. Sure. No I wouldn’t!

Texas is ranked #5 in his Power Ranking and ND #14, with ND DROPPING and Texas staying right up there at the top.  Now why is that? Is it bc ND’s earlier loss was to a worse team?  Well, only by one spot (#2 instead of #1).  Was it because the Irish got beat at home, in a more dominant win?  Nope, Texas got handled just as easily, and at home.

And regardless of the absolute positions in the polls, why are the Irish DROPPING after such a comeback while other teams move UP or at the least stay the same?  
That is my point.  And I say it stinks like my boys Ivan and Maisel here:

Share This

• Is Ivan Maisel Trying to Fight Off Early Alzheimers?
• The Status? On the way…
• West Virginia Keeps Coach, Burns Couch

Congratulations, Matt.

With this super-spawn of a child made up of genetic goo between yourself and your college girlfriend, twenty-some years from now you’ll sit proudly in the audience as your son, your son, your executioner brings down the house with his “sexy, but refreshingly light” tango in Dancing With the Stars.

The happy couple, seen here together. Well, ok, not together. In fact, we can’t find any pics of them actually together.

Share This

• Matt Leinart: Bad Baby Daddy
• Cheaters Sometimes Win
• Reggie Bush Accepted A Lot Of Gifts While At USC. HLS is Shocked. SHOCKED!

I’m just not sure what to do with this. Jason Whitlock moved over to AOLSports.com after being booted from Dear Leader in Sports for pointing out the obvious about a couple of his fellow ESPNers. And now The Big Lead has pointed out that the Hostess Spokesman has ripped open a can of whuppas (gets a link for this single merit) on Mitch Albom in his hysterically titled new column “Real Talk.”

What do we do? For whom do we cheer? This is like picking sides in the annual Miami/FSU game. Maybe it’s more apt to ask this: If Iran and North Korea start bombing the crap out of eachother, for which side do you cheer?

If Mitch and Jason were in a death match, what’s the best possible outcome? I figure if Jason lost, it would suddenly be a lot cheaper to feed the starving. But if Mitch were to die, the overall level of misery in the world would take a dip simply from the news of the event, possibly leading to the end of war.

Darfur - Could really benefit here.

TBL also pointed out that Sonar hasn’t touched his blog for weeks. I’m taking personal responsibility for that. You’re welcome, people of Earth.

Share This

• Support A Great Cause, And, Uh, Another, Uh, “Cause.”
• This Right Here is some BULLSHIT, ESPN.
• NFL To Introduce Radio Helmets. NCAA Licks Chops, Wonders About Ad Revenue Potential.

Forde doesn’t always get it right, but he got it right this week in his column about the 1-Loss Wonders on ESPN.com.  What I like most about it is that he finally puts the Irish loss to Michigan in perspective.  He doesn’t forgive ND for crapping the bed in their own house, but unlike the rest of the sports nation he doesn’t crucify the team either.  Which is refreshing.  His two main points are

1) Michigan is the #2 team in the country

2) The score looked a lot worse than it was

Excuses: The pass that went through tight end John Carlson’s hands and was returned for six on the opening series inflated Michigan’s confidence. Last Wolverines touchdown — another defensive TD — was a fluke that made the score look worse than it was. Leprechaun didn’t bring his A game.

Case for: [ND is the only one-loss team that] has played a schedule exclusively against opponents from the Big Six conferences to date. Nobody else has two comeback wins as dramatic as Notre Dame’s. Irish’s first five opponents all were undefeated at kickoff. Losing to Michigan is clearly not a sin.

Thanks for the ‘dash’ of reality.  I will not mock you for at least a week now.

And to top it off, he threw in this predction that I happened to like as well:

Still simmering from last year, Notre Dame turns USC game into a crusade and wins on a last-second Brady Quinn sneak, with a push from Darius Walker. Irish go 11-1 and throw the BCS Standings into complete chaos.

Instead of the Bush Push we get the Quinn Win?  The Walker Shocker?  The Samardzija Batmitzvah?  Okay, so that didnt quite rhyme. But it’s as close as anyone could get dammit! Do me one better, try it. Go ‘head.  Seriously, I triple dog dare you.

Share This

• SMQ’s Made His Picks…
• Brady Quinn Impresses at Pro Day
• Finally, Purdue Provides Some Material…