Dear HLS,

What’s wrong with our rushing offense? Would getting highly-touted freshmen like Aldridge and Prince in on more plays help? Surely you’d agree we need more gamebreaking speed at running back, right? Right!?

Thanks,

Feeling The Need For Speed

Dover Air Force Base, Delaware

Dear Needy,

We’d all like to know what the problem is with the rushing attack. The simplest answer is to tell you that our offensive line is actually spending this fall in Tampa, as the golfing is much better, and you can get the all-you-can-eat deal at Shoney’s for just 5.95 is you get there before 5:30! Still, we can’t just throw around statements like that, so we decided to do some actual research involving numbers, math, and stuff. Then we threw that all into some really high-powered computers that weren’t busy doing anything real important (thanks, NASA Dudes!), and took a look at the results.

It takes about 0.4 seconds for a Running Back to receive the ball on a handoff from the QB after the snap. Using complex image generating techniques, and really tricky algorithms, the computer created a model of what the Notre Dame running back usually faces .04 seconds into a rushing play. See for yourself, Needy. I’m not sure any player not named Reggie Bush could do much with this on a regular basis…

We hope this helps, Needy. Keep the great questions coming in!

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